All That Matters by ProudHanyou

Chapter 1

He stared blankly at the floor, all he saw was two little white paws. Looking up with foggy vision he could make a silver haired woman, chucking lightly. She smelled familiar, like him but not quite. He huffed not knowing exactly why.

Her bangs floated delicately from the movement of her ornate fan.

“This form will teach you humility. You must know you depend on others as much as others depend on you. You need to care for your people or you are a lord no more.” She turned her face from humorous to serious as one changes clothes.

“You will always be my son but with this attitude you will never be my lord.” The dog demoness shut her fan abruptly, she closed the distance looking down at the little puppy-like creature. “I will not let you.” She stared into his amber eyes with warning.

“You must seek someone to release you from this form. The ‘how’ is another less important matter.” The Lady of the West found her amused mask again. “You are a smart boy, you will figure this out, I am sure.” She walked slowly out of view, opening her fan once more.

Sesshomaru’s memories were gradually coming back. There was a fight, the woman with silver hair was provoking him in some manner. The only thing he could remember clearly was her mocking tone accompanied by her sly smirk.

He tried to stand but felt the heavy weight of silk on top of him, trying to get rid of it, he found himself suffocatingly buried under white and red clothes. Shaking it off wasn’t working. Humiliated, the little dog just backed off under the garments until his tail found an opening.

Gazing up in silence at the bundle of what used to be his armor, he growled furiously. The demon started to realize what brought this plague upon him and under a flood of rage mixed with utter disbelief he cursed his mother from the high heavens to the last circle of hell.

A young couple was passing by during this outburst of pure fury. “Look at the doggie, he angy.” A woman laughed at his enraged cuteness, trying to get close.

“Don’t touch it, this thing must have rabies or something.” The brown haired man warned wrinkled-nosed.

“No, he is healthy, look at him. Someone painted his face, look! He must be lost, poor thing.” She attempted to pet the markings in his head, noting the bundle of clothes he was sitting on.

As soon as the woman could get her hand close to the furry ball, the maddened little creature snapped and bit the side of her hand giving her two little puncture holes that soon began to bleed. “Ouch!” She cried.

Sesshomaru was struck by an ancient familiar smell, one that flooded him with memories he could almost, almost place but not quite. The sudden displacement in time left him staggered, utterly shocked. ‘Who is this girl?’ He tried so hard to remember, like a feather you are about to catch that keeps moving away from your reach.

“Kagome! Careful! I told you to not mess with street animals, you could catch something!” Hojo complained. “Let’s get you home and take care of this wound.” He examined her injury.

Kagome whined trying to pull her hand out of her friend’s close care. “Hojo, he is all alone, he will hurt himself! We have to take him!”

“No! You hurt yourself.” The man was serious, leaving no room for discussion. “Now, let’s go, you may have to take some shots.” He pulled her away from the feral animal.

Kagome could not help looking back, the dog's markings reminded her of something or… someone? She could feel the memory right around the corner of her mind, just peaking, never truly showing itself.

“Huh.” the woman quizzically eyed the somehow recognizable little beast.

‘Hn.’ The dog returned the same look.

The couple left him alone with himself, after a few seconds suspended in thought he suddenly remembered what made him so mad and turned his attention to the matter at hand. ‘This jest has gone too far.’ he tried to use his acute nose to find the root of his problems, all in vain. ‘Mother must be using some kind of spell.’ Sesshomaru huffed.

‘Stands to reason.’

It was past 2am. 

Kagome stirred nervously in her bed. The pillow felt too high, her covers felt too hot then it was too cold without it. For some reason she could not close her eyes and rest, all she could think about was the pain in her hand and the strange discarded dog at the park.

With a determined look in her face she kicked the covers to her side and got up. “I can’t sleep because of him, might as well just go get the little fucker and be done with this.” The woman complained, changing out of her pyjamas. 

Looking in the cabinet under the sink she found a little package half full with a caramel colored pomeranian picture on the front.  “I will borrow this, Yasha. Thank you.” Bringing her hands together, she made a silent prayer. 

Her purse in one hand, she took the bag with dog supplies with the other one. “This dog better be fucking cute.” Kagome locked the door behind her.

The park was near her apartment. Driving straight to the direction she remembered seeing the dog last, she shivered with cold and turned on the heat in her car. Arriving at the place, Kagome tried to make sure she was at the right spot, it was dark and the dog was nowhere near.

Getting out of her car, her vision was still adjusting with the new level of light, she could recognize the bundle of clothes she saw earlier nearby him. Closing the distance she crouched to pick it up. “Weird. This looks like an armor suit.” Kagome touched the soft silk feeling the strangely familiar tingling in the point of her fingers, she flinched startled at the well-known but long forgotten sensation.

“Must be his owner’s.” the woman grabbed the white material and brought it close to her face. This scent, she realized, had the same effect as the dog’s markings, the annoying feeling she was forgetting something important she almost could remember.

She figured she should keep these clothes for safety measure, she would return it to his owner once he was found. Kagome hugged the mountain of cloth and dumped into her car's trunk.

Unexpectedly a chill went down her spine, she felt observed. Turning to look for the source of the discomfort, her vision caught something directly behind her, a pair of solemn amber eyes sitting below a blue crescent moon. “Hey there, boy. I was looking for you.” 

“I have something for you.” Kagome reached into her trunk, pulled out the dog food package and poured some in her hand. “Maybe this will not be to your taste, you look fancy.” she began to slowly walk his way.

To her surprise, he didn’t move, he just sat here staring at her. No fear. “You calmed down, it seems.” Kagome carefully sat on the ground two feet from the unmoving furry thing and poured the dog food between them. 

His eyes never leaving hers, her eyes never leaving his.

'That woman again.'

He watched silently while she approached and sat right in front of him. There was something in her hand, it smelled like dry meat, she spilled it on the ground like an offering to an antediluvian god.

Her scent assaulted his nostrils, so familiar yet so alien to him. ‘I know this human.’ The demon dog stated in his own head. He looked deep into her ocean blue eyes and inhaled her sweet floral scent trying to recollect something he redimed lost. His pupils dilated as he was brutally attacked by remembrance.

Blue. Red. Laugh. Whispers. Moans. Promises. Tears. Pain.

A well.

A sealed well.

‘Kagome?’ He took one step closer.

“Hey, buddy, I mean no harm.” She laughed standing still not to scare him.“Your markings are funny, they look familiar somehow.” The woman blabbed, gently raising her hand for him to smell it.

“You remind me a lot of my late dog, Yasha.” She gave a sad smile. “He is in dog heaven now. I love him a lot.”

Sesshoumaru neared, offering her a nuzzle in her hand. ‘She doesn’t remember me.’ He realized sadly, despite the fact he didn’t recall her either. He thought of himself as an extremely memorable creature and that was a slap on his face.

She was surprised by his sudden show of trust, the dog in front of her didn’t look frightened but didn’t look interested either, yet something changed one minute ago, his posture, something in his tiny amber eyes. Was he trying to comfort her? This made her smile.

“Hey, I have a place with lots of food and a warm bed for you, if you want.” She explained feeling silly for doing that to a dog, but then again, he seemed to understand what she was saying, somehow. “So, wanna come?” 

Kagome got up from her sitting position and started to walk slowly to her car hoping he would take the hint and follow her. Every few steps she would take a pick to see if he was moving, he wasn’t. She began walking very slowly to give him a chance to catch up, yet he was making no motion.

Finally, after an excruciatingly slow 15 feet walk, Kagome stopped by her car. Another pick, he was still stoically immobile. Sighing she put her hand on the car door handle. Another pick. Unexpectedly he was behind her, not one moviment, one sound. Nothing.

“Jesus fucking Christ.” She yelled, pissed. “Are you a ninja or something?” The woman put a hand on her chest, breathing raspingly.

‘Something.’ He replied amused, only to himself.

She was still the wonderfully foul-mouthed miko that befriended his brother and absorbed his whole unbelievably nasty vocabulary. He was still him, though? She would even recognize him if she’d come to remember them someday?

Sesshomaru observed while she calmed down, tilting his head. 

“Ok, since you tried to kill me with a heart attack, it’s safe to say I can bring you home as payback.” She said, opening the passenger door for him.

Effortlessly he made an elegant jump to the offered seat, ironically catlike. “Wow, you are fancy.”

Kagome closed the door and went to her side. “You know you will have to take a bath to clean those weird markings on your face.” 

“Your owner is very irresponsible to let their kid draw on you like that.” There was a concerned look on her face. She started the car and began her short trip home, now with company.

After getting to her residence, much to Sesshomaru’s disbelief the human vainly tried to wipe his markings off in the shower, she looked confused.

“Those can’t be real, this must be some industrial marker.” Kagome complained, annoyed. She rubbed the moon in his head attentively, glaring at it, lost in thought as one does gazing at the infinite horizon.

Seeing she was motionless yet still rubbing his crescent moon delicately, Sesshomaru huffed to get her attention.

“Oh, sorry,” She came back from her contemplative state, “I got lost for a second there.” She laughed.  “Better wrap this up and go to bed,” The woman stated.

“On the bright side, you don’t have a single flea and look healthy too. That will teach Hojo.” Kagome added triumphantly.

Sesshomaru unexpectedly, even for himself, growled after hearing the other male’s name.

“Hey, he is a nice guy, I swear.” She laughed while drying his white fur.

“Now let’s go to bed,” She exited the bathroom calling for him “you will sleep on the rug by bed.” Said pointing to the place, to which he simply stared for half a second until he decided it was not fit for him.

Sesshomaru gave a graceful leap and sat on the end of the bed, defiantly glaring into her eyes.

“You gotta be kidding me. You will sleep on the rug like I said.” She exasperatingly pointed again to the old beat up cloth on the floor. 

His only response was giving a spin before lying on the spot he deemed acceptable.

“Fuck this, you win. I don’t have enough energy to fight pompous dogs at this hour.” She threw her arms in the air.

Kagome got under the covers, defeated and irritated. “I hope you are happy with yourself.”

There was no answer.

She stared blankly at the floor, all she could see was the green skirt of her old school outfit and her old overused brown shoes.

Looking up with foggy vision she could make a silver haired man, gazing silently.

The wind blew warm. How strange, she could swear it was winter.

She was sitting on something, blindly she caressed the wood beneath her.

A well.

The man seems closer now. “Who are you?” her voice failed her almost completely. 

The man was saying something, his mouth was moving yet she couldn’t hear which words were being expelled. He looked so heartbreakingly sad.

“I can’t hear you.” she alerted the stranger.

He was closing the distance between them, the broken man was still repeating what seemed like one single word.

The tears were now breaking the last barrier that held them in place. “I can’t hear you.” Kagome got up from her seat yelling and distressed.

She could hear the birds, the wind, the grass under her feet. Still, Kagome could not even faintly hear what the man was saying.

He looked like he was shouting now, he was so close. Something stopped him. The man began to hit an invisible barrier with both fists. Still yelling the same word.

With every hit he gave the unseen wall the whole floor vibrated and with it her already dangerously fast beating heart.

Still not a sound was coming from it.

Anguished she tried to read his lips, he was smacking the barrier too hard it made it difficult to try it. Focusing her eyes, she attempted to translate the silent call once more.

“Re...mem...ber.” Kagome mimicked his lips. 

Suddenly she heard a loud final thud and a deafening shattering noise. The white haired man, invested as he was in breaking the wall, didn’t notice when it collapsed.

All at once she could hear it all, could see it all. All there was, all there is.

Her pupils dilated as she was brutally attacked by remembrance.

Amber. Red. Laugh. Whispers. Moans. Promises. Tears. Pain.

A well.

A sealed well.

"Sesshomaru?" She whispered quietly, eyes wide.

The man stumbled in her direction hugging her with all his might, she gasped and lost her balance. They both fell into the well.

Into darkness.

Into darkness she woke up, sweating and breathless. Sitting, she looked for something so recently found.

Her eyes met him in the moonlight shooting through the window, still sitting in the same spot by her feet, unblinking. “Sesshomaru?” She inquired apprehensive.

A flicker from the most terribly inhuman yellow eyes she had ever seen was her answer.

Sesshomaru was quite pleased with himself. His father had taught him the secrets of dream walking and for many centuries he judged the technique utterly useless. Until now. He had come to her in her sleep, to help her remember, or rather aggressively assist her. The dreams were also used to explain his remarkably inconvenient situation and how he needed help to turn back to normal.

In the morning she was trying to gather her thoughts. “And you think I can help you?” He heard her say incredulously.

He tilted his head to the side, not quite able to give a reply.

“I mean, yeah, I will help you with everything I got,” She explained “the problem is: everything I got is not much.” She laughed nervously.

He tilted his head to the other side.

Unexpectedly he growled in her direction catching her attention. She noticed he wasn’t really growling at her, but the door behind her. About thirty seconds later she hears the doorbell and gets up to welcome whoever was.

The demon dog still growling followed her to the door and stayed a few feet behind. ‘That despicable weak male again.’ His snarl was gravely low.

“Hey, Kagome.” Sesshomaru was listening to the brown haired male stumble upon his words.

“I haven’t heard from you since yesterday so I thought I should stop by and see if everything is ok.” He rubbed the back of his neck, half embarrassed. 

'Pathetic.' The demon dog could smell his interest, he barked angry.

Hojo immediately spotted the white dog behind her. “You took this fleabag home?” He asked, pissed. “Don’t you worry about catching something from that?” 

“Not really, I gave him a bath. He was actually pretty clean.” She announced proudly.

“You should throw that thing out.” Hojo suggested.

Sesshomaru could smell her irritation.

“Look, Hojo, I’m glad you stopped by, as you can see I’m well. Take care.” She informed him, trying to close the door, he put his feet on the threshold so she couldn’t.

“I’m worried about you, Kagome.” He gave a frowned look.

Alarmed, Sesshomaru got up and started to growl manancely. 

“Shush. Sit.” He was taken aback by the sudden old command she had the habit of using on his brother.

‘This woman tests me.’ He concluded, baffled.

“Hojo, I know we’ve been friends since god knows when but that doesn’t give you any rights. I’m telling you I’m ok and I’m keeping Sesshomaru.” Kagome declared, clearly peeved.

“You named it?” Hojo insisted.

“That’s his name. Now, you will take that foot off my door or you are limping to the nearest emergency. Which one will you choose?” She asked, losing the rest of her patience.

“Alright, fine. I will go. Call me when you have calmed down.” The man said, removing his feet from the smashing zone.

“Yeah, don’t wait up.” Kagome snorted, closing the door.

She turned to look at her new companion. “You know, I don’t need you to take care of me. I’ve been doing this alone for a long time, mind you.”

The little dog whimpered, giving a step in her direction. She sighed.

“I know it’s not your fault, neither is mine. It just happened I completed my duty as the shikon miko and as a reward I lost you, I lost everyone.” She chuckled sadly. 

“Life is a bitch, huh?”

Kagome was amused.

After being throw in a well to the past, which mind you she did not ask for, she had to dedicate her teen years to completing and fully eradicating a jewel that it was not her responsibility, fall in love with boy, fall out of it, make friends, watch them become her family, almost die everyday, fall in love with a man, suffer every minute of it for not knowing what would happen to them and lose it all, again carrying a responsibility it was not even hers to begin with. The worst part of this shit sunday with shit sprinkles and a shit cherry on top of it: they were not remembered.

Now that she got him back, he was trapped in a lap dog form.

Kagome was so fucking amused.

“It’s a long shot but,” She began “now that I have my memories back, I seem to remember Kaede-sama’s miko lessons.” 

“One of those lessons was on how to break a magic seal with reiki.” The woman was trying hard to recall the exact technique, learned 500 years in the past. “If that’s really a seal and more importantly a youki seal, maybe I can do something about it.” 

“Now,” Kagome sat on her bed and motioned for him to get on it too “My miko powers are rusty.” She watched him leap on the suggested spot.

It was weird, she always felt her reiki deep inside her, she just didn’t remember what it was until now.

Gently she put her hands on the sides of his little canine head and closed her eyes, concentrating as she softly pressed the moon with her two thumbs. 

Not knowing exactly what to do she just tried to search for something that felt different from his wild youki. Her brow began to sweat, she was almost reaching something, a youki seal deep within his soul, tightly holding his power.

“I found something.” She alerted, panting from all the spiritual exertion. “I will try to break it now. This might hurt a little, I’m sorry.” Kagome felt him tense in her hold.

The miko began to cautiously wrap the youki seal trying to overpower it, the response was immediate, whatever it was, was pushing back aggressively.

It was time for a final explosive press. She removed her hands from him and started gathering reiki on her fingers, when redimed enough she crushed the pink involved seal.

It vanished.

“Did it work?” Her voice crackled.

No response.

“Please, if it worked, answer me.” The tears were rolling beneath her closed eyelids. “I’m afraid to look, I can’t lose you again.” She was openly weeping.

Suddenly, she felt two warm clawed hands tenderly holding her face.

Her ocean blue eyes shot open with surprise, her tears sliding over his calloused fingers.

“Hn.” He finally declared.

How can you miss so much something you didn’t even remember you had?



How can you miss so much something you didn’t even remember you had? They both questioned at the same time, not even knowing they had the exact same thought.

Simultaneously they reached for each other’s mouths, hungrier than ever.

Kagome was suddenly very aware he was completely nude after sliding a hand to delicately caress his toned abdomen with her nails. This earned her a groan between their lips.

Sesshomaru’s senses were hazy from the unspeakably crushing thirst she was bringing up to his surface, his cock already painfully hard. He broke their kiss to let her breath.

The buried memories of all the times they had locked their lips in burning passion, all the times they laid panting and covered in sweat, all the times she used the sheets to hold for her dear life, all the times he felt her wet walls exquisitely making him her prisoner, all of them flooded his mind in an instant.

“How I missed your sinfully delicious lips,” He watched her blush to his statement “your hauntingly sweet scent,” He reached for her ear to whisper “your unbearably tight pussy.” He smirked, feeling her tense with embarrassment.

Her feverish skin invited his touch, his lips parted in wanting, searching for the spot on her neck he knew would bring instant results, he gave gentle kisses and let his fangs roam on her sweet scented flesh. Sesshomaru was attentively listening to every groan, every moan, every little sigh, slowly remembering every special place on her body and confirming thoroughly the veracity of his still recovering memory, just in case.

Leading a path of destruction, he followed the kiss route down to her chest, ever so slightly breathing in her floral scent between every delicate bite, his mouth watering from the thought of her nipples separating his lips.

There was a problem, the irritating thin sleeping garment she was using. Sesshomaru had to claw the cloth to sheds, it gave in like silk paper. It was the only way.

“Hey! My jammies!” Kagome complained annoyedly, recollecting all the lingerie he had already put an end to. “I can’t take them off, you know?”

“You will not need this useless attire anymore.” He explained simply. “You will be wearing my scent tonight.”

Kagome was taken aback by his plain explanation but had no time to plan a retort. 

Before any quick thought she could have, he was carefully ravishing the hard pink point of her right breast and delicately rubbing his thumb on her left nipple.

Sesshomaru could hear her surprised gasp melting into an absolutely delicious moan, music to his demonic ears.

The human woman was losing herself in the tending tongue playing with her fragile creamy skin, never having been touched with such care, in this life at least.

Tension began to build up as she felt his hands slide from her nipple down her belly, clearly looking for a deeper place. The anticipation now becoming unbearable for every inch his deadly claws descended down her trembling torso, her insides twisting in need, her entrance dripping and welcoming.

For what seemed like centuries she waited, his hand finally reached the hem of her pyjama bottom, her legs instinctively opened for his access, she felt him smirking on her nipple between warm licks.

His venturing digits looking for their rightful place, she felt his claws retracting for her comfort and transpassing the last of the barriers of her sanity. His rough fingers sliding down her swollen folds, so slowly rubbing her clit on the way to her damp slit.

Kagome’s breathing stopped for a second when his fingers slipped inside her, her aroused scent was solid in the air.

He left her breast to appreciate her silky flesh covered in a thin layer of sweat, her head thrown back making her neck fully exposed, he admired with craving. The human quivering form shining under the moonlight was nature's sublimest creation, the demon lord concluded.

Sesshomaru freed his fingers from her wetness and licked his fingers, not a single drop of her desire was going to be wasted.

He cupped her blushing face to catch her attention, her big blue eyes locking on his, the silence hanging in the space between their bodies for a second, his thumb tenderly caressed her bottom lip, contemplating her existence, being grateful for it.

“Breathtaking.” A sigh left his lips, his silver lashes hooding his darkened amber eyes.

In one quick motion he made yet another unusable cloth from her pyjama, she gasped with the swiftness of his movement, this time not finding a real reason to complain.

The voracious demon got his arm under her waist to secure her position, never taking his eyes of hers, his cock dangerously close to her sensitive folds. Ready to make her lips blossom like a flower, he made his way through her entrance, taking note of every reaction to make sure she wasn’t hurting, her tight core devouring his thick length inch by inch, her moans louder and more frequent by the second. Kagome meowed when her outer lips reached the base of his erection.

Youki and reiki sparked within their connection, their skin tingling with familiarity, her soaked depths pulsing, asking, begging for him not to stop, to never stop.

The duty he assumed for the rest of his existence was to give everything she ever asked for, so he obeyed. 

She was about to complain regarding the sudden void feeling but never came to voice her objection, she didn’t have time as he filled her whole again, he began picking up his pace, his now animalistic eyes focusing on hers, still holding her face.

The room was filled with nothing but their intertwined aroused scent, her soft moans and his wild groans.

The moonlight spreading through the window was the sole witness of their urgent hunger.

Their flesh shocking against each other in an excruciatingly raw show of need, angrily and lovingly, all at once.

His thrusts became harder and harder, his name escaping her lips between moans, asking for more, asking to go deeper, daring him to make her come and inviting his cock to fill her with his seed, so anyone bold enough to defy his claim will know who she belongs to.

“Ses-shomaru...I’m going to…” she couldn’t finish her phrase mid-panting as her entire body tensed with an ungodly orgasm. He was already dreadfully near when he felt her core close tightly around his erection, he was then undone, his own overwhelming climax mixed with hers.

The large body collapsed by her side, hugging her waist still. He sighed heavily, shifting to accommodate her head on his chest.

They laid awake, soaking in each other’s long needed presence, his chin resting on the top of her head, letting himself drown in her scent, his arm securing her body with his.

“You will never leave again.” He told his wife. “I will not permit it.” His eyes still closed.

She chuckled at his sudden statement. “I never intended to, remember?” A hint of sadness in her voice. “If it was up to me I would never leave your side.” 

He felt relieved somehow. Deep inside he knew she was not the one to make this decision, yet he felt cheated, not by her, but by destiny. 

“I’m so glad we found each other again. I didn’t remember you, yet I always felt there was something missing, like an ill-fitting suit, something wasn’t right.” She confessed, her hand on this toned chest.

He considered her words. “I am here now, so are you. That is all that matters.” She was pressed against him.

Sesshomaru couldn’t stop wondering though, was this his mother's plan? Did she remember Kagome somehow? Did his mother know Kagome could break the seal? 

Of one thing he knew, from all the times his mother manipulated him, this is the only one he was actually thankful for.

“Yeah.” She sighed in his chest. “That is all that matters.” Kagome agreed.

Both drifted to a dreamless sleep, for the source of their wildest dreams was already laying on that bed.