Standard disclaimer applies.
It literally just popped in my head one day. Tell me what you think, because this is the first Sesshoumaru/Kagome fic I've ever written, since I usually prefer Inu/Kagome, so tell me how I'm doing.
Didn't add anything, just made some grammatical changes that were bugging me. Hopefully I got them all.
All in Moderation
By: Luna
The street lights flew by in a smear; like a glob of paint smeared across a blank canvas with a careless stroke of a brush. She giggled to herself, attempting to reach them, but the cool glass of the taxi cabs' back seat window only allowed her to reach half way. She frowned, feeling herself slipping down on the seat. She tried pushing herself up a little, but her legs felt boneless, and she only slid a little further.
Giving up, she sighed, and simply stayed slumped until the taxi rolled to a slow stop, and the man asked her something. She could only stare at him blankly, so he gave a frustrated sigh and moved out of the car. Shortly after that her side door opened, and she blinked in surprise to find her younger brother Souta staring down at her in something akin to horror and shock.
"Kagome! What the...! You never drink! What the hell happened to you?" Even as he sputtered, Kagome lovingly traced his handsome features, feeling so proud of her family that Souta managed to grow up looking so handsome. He'd never have to worry about people leaving him, and she tried to tell him that before giving him a sloppy smile. He sighed, watching her.
Grinning stupidly, she lifted her hands up like a child and let her strong little brother carry her towards the house. Mom was away on her honeymoon with her new husband, and Souta was house-sitting. How had the driver managed to get her home? Feeling more than a little woozy, Kagome let her head fall against her strong little brother's shoulder and watched as the cab driver handed over her black little purse. Did he steal from her? How did he get it?
They murmured something, and then Souta pulled, with some difficulty, some bills out of Kagome's wallet and handed it over to the cab driver. Then it was all a blur as he turned suddenly on his heel to walk back up the steps to the shrine, and all the lights were a smear again. Kagome thought for a moment she was falling and practically clawed her hands to Souta's shoulders, only to realize that he held her quite firmly and her balance was just off. She laughed, because she thought it was funny.
When he reached the house he didn't take her upstairs, but set her on the couch and pulled a quilt that was draped over the back of it over her. He sighed again. "I thought you were going to be the DD tonight? Didn't Eri want you to drive everyone home after the party?"
Oh. That's right. Eri's bachelorette party. Kagome sat up so she'd be able to lean in conspiratorially into Souta's ears. "She did." Another giggle. "But then I accidentally got drunk and found Hojo accidentally in Eri's pants and," Here, she lowered her voice. "he was quite sober."
Souta's face was frozen for a moment before pity started creeping into his eyes, and suddenly Kagome wanted another drink. Don't look at me like that. It was the only sober thought in her head before she passed out, her forehead hitting Souta straight in his chest. Sighing again, he stroked a hand down Kagome's jet black hair as he stared off in the distance, thinking about her fiancé Hojo. Well, ex-fiancé now, hopefully. Kagome was very forgiving, or she had been once, and he hoped she wouldn't forgive Hojo for this and take him back. He never really liked Hojo; something about him just seemed too... perfect. No one was completely perfect, and that fact about Hojo caused Souta to distrust him. Now, he was glad he finally had an excuse for him to dislike Hojo.
The front door rattled a little before he heard someone come in, and he gently laid Kagome down on the couch again and firmly tucked the blanket around her dozing body. A bottle of water and a few aspirin were suddenly set down next to the little in-table by the couch, and Souta looked gratefully up into his girlfriend's eyes. Poor Kagome. Always chosen second best, even after all these years.
As Souta walked hand in hand with Miki upstairs to his room, he silently prayed that something good, for once, would happen to his big sister, whom he's always admired.
/--/
Kagome woke up the next morning praying to die. Weakly, she pulled the blanket over her eyes and cursed the never ending racket going on inside her head. If this is what happens after a night of nothing but alcohol, she never wanted to drink again! Oh God, she silently prayed, cracking an eye open and seeing the water and pills in front of her. Gulping both down quickly, she curled back underneath the blanket and pulled it over her eyes so the light wouldn't get in.
Her stomach felt weird; nauseous, empty, and just plain sick. She thought she might be hungry too, but at just the thought her stomach lurched. There seemed to be an extra pulse in the back of her eyes, setting a tempo with the beat of her heart, and she gritted her teeth and pressed the heels of her hands against her closed lids in an effort to stop the pulsing. Her head felt much like her stomach. Nauseous, empty, and just plain sick; only this time it hurt, too.
Groaning, she blindly reached out for the water bottle and tucked it inside her haven with her. She managed to only get the couch a little wet when she opened it and brought it to her lips. She didn't care if it looked silly and she back washed a hundred times, but she kept her lips sealed over the bottle since she was still laying down, and slowly drank until the bottle was empty. Her stomach didn't agree with that, and she only had a few moments to run to the bathroom and empty her stomach before she embarrassed herself in the living room.
Since she thought she might pass out again, she dragged herself out of the bathroom back to the couch and her makeshift haven. She didn't know how long she lay there, but when she finally felt confident enough to peak out from underneath the blanket, she smelled coffee and knew Souta was in the kitchen making breakfast.
She felt a little bad since she knew her brother was going to have a girl over, and she didn't want to ruin it for him. Slowly, she dragged herself to the kitchen and made a beeline for the coffee machine, not even to bother seeing who else was in the kitchen. Only after she poured what she thought was an adequate dosage of sweet creamer in her coffee did she allow herself to move again. When she went to sit at the table, she stopped, blinking blearily at the cute blonde girl that was looking shyly back.
"Oh," she said, her mouth tasting like acid as her tongue stuck to the roof of her mouth. God, she needed to brush her teeth. "You must be," she waved a hand in the air as if seeking inspiration before a name floated to her conscious. "Ah, the American girl. Becky something-or-other."
"Kagome, this is Miki." Souta's voice was slightly reprimanding as he came up behind her. "I broke up with Becky over two years ago."
Slowly, Kagome blinked, willing her eyes to focus. Only until Miki's face became clear did Kagome offer her an apologetic smile. "Sorry. I think I'm still a little drunk and going blind this morning. Please ignore almost everything I say to you, since I'm not sure I'll remember it tomorrow."
She didn't know if that would be true. She only drank a few times, but never had she been this drunk. Why had she drank more than she should have last night? There was something niggling at the back of her brain that she felt she should remember. A little wobbly, Kagome collapsed on a chair and then just laid her head on the table, completely lax. She really felt like shit.
Out of no where, she jumped up again and ran to the bathroom, cursing herself for thinking that she should drink coffee, especially with all that sugar inside. The door slammed behind her and for the next ten minutes Kagome spent her time hugging the toilet until her stomach once again felt hollow and empty, and even then she started dry heaving. Crying a little in misery, she reached up to grab a hair clip on the sink counter and shakily clipped her hair away from her face before resting her cheek against the toilet seat. The cold shock of the bathroom floor felt as if it were burning the skin on her bare legs, and she cried a little more when she pulled a towel underneath her.
The downstairs bathroom was in close range to the front door, so when someone knocked on the door, she was able to vaguely hear who it was. She had been listlessly resting her head on the rim of the toilet when Souta's angry voice cut into her daze, and then a much quieter voice. A man. Then she froze, recognizing the subdued, respectful tone of voice. Oh God. Oh God.
Hojo.
The man she was supposed to wed in three months that had been caught bare assed in the act of sleeping with her best friend on the day before that said best friend was supposed to get married to another. And he was sober. Sober! There was no excuse for his betrayal.
Hojo.
He had been her comfort, her friend, and then a lover in those months and years after her last departure down her tragic little well. He had been there almost everyday since she tried and tried to jump through time and failed again and again. She no longer possessed the Shikon no Tama, and so the well no longer saw fit to let her see Inuyasha again.
Over and over, despite the truth jarring her body every time an attempt failed to go down the well again. Kagome couldn't accept that, in the end and after everything that they had been through together, Inuyasha hadn't chosen her. He'd chosen Kikyo, using his precious wish to put life back into her body. He'd hugged her as she cried and being low enough to even beg him not to let her go, murmured words she didn't even remember to comfort her, then he turned to let go of her hand and let her fall through time for the last time, knowing he'd never see her again. He hadn't even smiled. Hadn't even cried. Simply watched her fall and disappear into magic, never to be seen again.
And Hojo had been the one to be there when she cried. Hojo had been the one to find her curled in a ball in the well house and sat her on his lap to comfort her. He hadn't understood why she always stared at the well, for months, and then sometimes after years, a deep longing in her eyes, but he never questioned it. They hadn't been "boyfriend and girlfriend" until she hit college and was able to finally, finally, put the past behind her to allow herself to fall in love with Hojo as badly as he had fallen in love with her.
And now he was sleeping with her soon-to-be married best friend. Or ex-best friend. Kagome was sure that she wouldn't be forgiving Eri anytime soon. Like an old woman, Kagome slowly rose from off the floor and let the straps of her slinky black dress fall from her shoulders so it could slide like silk down her body to puddle at her feet.
Kagome stared, slowly and hard at her body clad in black lingerie in the full length mirror, staring at her curved, supple body and full breasts, the wild black hair pinned back and the cool blue eyes. She knew she was beautiful. Even at fifteen and in Inuyasha's time, she knew she was beautiful. Then what was it that she lacked? Was it just a defect in her personality that caused men to cheat on her over and over again? The only two men she had ever had in her life had turned their back on her to be with other women, and for the life of her Kagome didn't know why.
Maybe it was her.
Slowly, she then shed her lingerie so she stood naked in front of the mirror so she could see clearly if her body had any flaw. She knew it didn't. At thirty-two, she was in her prime.
So with a sigh, she turned away from her reflection and turned on the shower, waiting until it was piping hot before she stepped underneath the spray. She lost track of time at how long she stood in the shower, but she managed to rouse herself enough to wash every inch of her thoroughly before stepping out. She hadn't brought any clothes with her, so she was forced to step back into her dress that reeked of alcohol. With a sigh, she finally stepped out of the bathroom feeling physically, if not emotionally, better. Then she rooted around the living room for her black stilettos and her purse before slipping outside while she still heard Souta's voice murmuring in the kitchen.
She decided to walk home, since she didn't feel like spending the last of her cash on a cab. Her apartment wasn't too far away, so it wasn't like it was a hardship. Half way back, however, a thought suddenly occurred to her, and she stopped in the middle of the sidewalk (much to the consternation of everyone around her). Hojo shared an apartment with her. Hojo was probably waiting for her to come back home so he could... could what? Explain? Apologize? Kagome wasn't ready for either.
Slumping dejectedly against the building she stood next to, Kagome bleakly thought of where it was that she was supposed to go to now. She stared down at the cement sidewalk and simply stood there, letting her mind go blank and allow anger to fill her. Why had Hojo ruined everything? Things seemed to have been going great. It's true that the sex had never been that good in the first place, and now she was starting to wonder if that was her fault too.
Was this the first time Hojo ever cheated on her? Or had this been going on for a while? The two of them looked too comfortable together to have been a one time thing.
Closing her eyes, she waited to see if she would cry, and yet nothing came. Why? Maybe it was a sign. Maybe she had been receiving signs for a while now and it was just now hitting home. It hurt. It didn't matter that she hadn't cried a lot, or yelled, or screamed. It burned her heart like a fire and left nothing but ashes in its wake. This was the second time. The second time she fell for someone and was found lacking.
Opening her eyes, Kagome blinked when the cement sidewalk now had a pair of shoes blocking her view. Praying to God it wasn't Hojo; Kagome followed the long legs up to a trim waist and a broad chest, and then blinked again when the eyes she met were golden. He didn't look as dumbfounded as she felt, but she knew he was shocked enough to have stopped.
His hair was still beautifully long, still smooth and sleek and still made Kagome jealous that her hair wasn't as pretty. He didn't have the demon markings on him anymore and his ears were blunt like a human, but with the changing of the times, Kagome didn't doubt that he found a way to disguise himself. And he was still just as coldly beautiful as he had been five hundred years ago.
"Hello, Sesshoumaru." Her voice was low and subdued, but she didn't doubt he heard her.
His eyes sharpened a bit as they slowly traveled down her body, and Kagome was surprised when she felt herself blushing. She didn't know she could blush at her age. She suddenly felt embarrassed, because she knew that if she smelled alcohol on her clothes, she must smell horrible to him with his heightened sense of smell. She self consciously tugged at her dress before straightening away from the wall, and even managed a small smile.
"It's been a long time, and I've grown older. I didn't think you'd even recognize me if we ever met each other again." Or even that he'd be alive and still look so wonderful.
He paused, like he was considering his words. "Despite how you reek like a drunk, underneath it all you smell very much the same."
Kagome's mouth dropped open again, and she resisted the urge to speak, knowing with her mouth open she'd probably just squawk. The Lord Sesshoumaru, after all these years, remembered what she smelled like? She hadn't known he knew what she smelled like to begin with. She managed to close her mouth and make it smile. "And you still look the same. Maybe a little older, like in your forties, but you still look nearly the same. Very handsome."
He merely cocked his head to the side and studied her without speaking. Then he straightened and said, "You smell. Why don't you go home and clean yourself."
Home. With Hojo there, waiting.
Her smile faded. "Right. Good seeing you again."
Then she walked past him and didn't look back, even though she wanted to. She thought that she might have felt him staring after her, but simply closed her eyes and continued walking. The moment she rounded the corner she let loose the breath she hadn't known she was holding. Then she straightened her shoulders as much as she could and pretended she wasn't still slightly drunk, and walked slowly back to home.
When she stepped through the apartment door, Hojo wasn't there. She was relieved. She hoped her mother wouldn't mind, but she was going back home until she could find another apartment. There were only a few things she needed to pack; she hadn't even finished unpacking even half of her belongings. Was it a sign?
She called up a moving company and put in an emergency order so that they'd come right away, and then she went through every room until every trace of her was gone. She even sprayed air freshener so that not even her scent could remain. The movers came in shortly after and took all of her boxes. Kagome took one last look around her before she walked to the kitchen table and slowly took off the diamond engagement ring to set it on the counter.
Here, she cried a little, hating to see the one piece of evidence that, at one point, proved that a man had loved her enough to want to marry her. It had been the only time she could remember ever being truly needed the way a man sometimes needed a woman. Not as a friend who needs to cure a hole in his hand or a friend who wants to free her brother, and not as a copy or a shard detector. Just a man wanting and loving a woman enough to want to spend his life with her.
But that dream was over. Hopefully one day she'd gather enough strength to wish for a new one.
Hojo rejected her and now she was nothing but a woman who could do nothing but walk away. With one last look around, Kagome turned and did just that. She would be able to change at her mother's house, but for now she'd still have to stink. She didn't want to be here when Hojo came back home.
Souta wasn't surprised when she showed up again, but didn't say anything as Kagome instructed the workers to take all her boxes back into her old room. She hoped she'd be able to find an apartment before her mothers honeymoon was over, but she wasn't sure. Instead of thinking about it, she quickly changed out of her dress and took another shower before changing into some comfortable jeans and a violet tee.
Miki had left, probably to one of her college classes, and Souta was just beginning to put on some sneakers to be on his way too. Kagome smiled at him. "Thank you Souta. I don't know what I'd do without you."
He gave her a wink and picked up his book bag. "What are brothers for?"
Going up to him, she marveled at how tall he was at twenty-three, towering over her by at least four or five inches. He shifted in discomfort when she continued to smile warmly at him. "What is it?"
Kagome shook her head. "I'm just surprised at how handsome you turned out to be. You were so ugly when you were little."
Rolling his eyes, Souta turned and opened the door. "Whatever. Don't burn down the house while I'm gone. Mom'll think it was me."
"Whatever." She said, mimicking his tone. "Get out of here, squirt, or you'll be late for school."
When he left, she was still smiling. She ate only light foods all day since she was afraid of upsetting her stomach. It was kind of lonely eating dinner alone, but it was also a blessing. She didn't want to see anybody, and it gave her time to think.
She believed in signs. She always had. She believed it was a sign, or at least now she did, that all those years ago when she was nothing but a child that she should have known what Inuyasha's decision would be since he never hesitated to chase after Kikyo the minute he caught on to her scent. She thought that it was another sign, a rather big one, when fate refused her entry back into the past. It had just been her own foolishness that made her want to keep trying.
What was the sign with Hojo? That she never completely unpacked? But what else? Surely there would've been a bigger sign then that. She was aware that the sex wasn't that good, but she didn't know if that could be considered a sign. He had been the perfect gentlemen. Always kind, always loving, always being there for her when she needed him. Maybe the sign had been him being too perfect. But he had always been there! Always there when she needed him...
And the one time she hadn't needed him he had been in Eri's arms, nearly naked and looking very comfortable.
And then... there was Sesshoumaru. That was a sign. Surely that was a sign. But... what kind? Why? Is he going to be a part of her future? She didn't think so. Even though they never really bothered with each other in the past, it would be weird thinking the great Lord Sesshoumaru was any part of her future. But she couldn't just dismiss him. Despite her heart feeling torn out just last night, she couldn't get him out of her mind. Was that a sign, too?
He had looked so much older and regal than what her last memory of him was. The power he held in absolute control was still there, only bigger and stronger than ever before. It was past a decade since she had seen that kind of power, and she didn't try to delude herself into thinking it wasn't attractive.
Out of curiosity, she went to her mom's computer and typed Sesshoumaru's name in the search bar. Once again, she felt her jaw dropping. He was a multibillionaire! How could she not have heard his name before? Of course, she knew that, no matter what era he was in he'd be rich; the Lord of the Western Lands would accept no less. But in billions? Then she looked up his address and wondered if she had the courage to stop by and visit him.
Scribbling down his address, she then went through her clothes boxes and picked out a classy, daytime outfit. He had been dressed in a silk suit, she was sure. She wanted to look the best she could, but she didn't want it to look like she was trying to be something she wasn't. Looking classy wasn't something someone could force.
She waited until a little before lunch time before walking outside. Then she smacked herself in the head for forgetting she left her car at the club. She had the keys, but it was pointless without the car. Sighing, she went back inside and grabbed the keys to her mom's minivan. A big change from her Lexus, but it'll have to do.
Not knowing exactly why she was doing this, she made herself think of completely different things as she drove to his mansion. When she pulled in front of his gates, she pressed the intercom button and told herself to breath normally. A woman's cheerful voice answered, and Kagome almost said, "Sorry, wrong house." And drove off. Instead, she pushed aside her strange disappointment for it not being Sesshoumaru who answered. Of course he'd have maids or whoever it was that answered phone calls and intercoms.
"Is Sesshoumaru there?" she asked, holding her breath.
The woman's silence told her she was surprised. "Um, may I ask who this is?"
"Tell him it's Kagome."
"Last name, ma'am?" The woman asked, a little less cheerful.
"He knows who I am."
She heard the intercom being pressed, then the woman let off on it again and the line was silent. Then Sesshoumaru himself answered. "Come in."
Nerves began to rattle her as she pulled up in the drive, and then went completely still as she stood on his door step and watched as he opened the door himself and then merely stood there, watching her as much as she was watching him. He had always looked so perfect. Today was no exception. She smiled at him anyways and forced herself not to fidget.
"Hello again."
Without a word he stepped aside, and she followed him to a small drawing room that overlooked his gardens. He stood next to a baby grand, and Kagome stopped next to the window, her back to him. She didn't know if, after all her bravado, she could face him in a civilized environment and make intelligent conversation. What on earth had she been thinking?
"What are you doing here?"
His voice was low and calm, and for some reason sent shivers down her spine. Humorlessly, she leaned her forehead against his spotless glass window and touched her fingertips to the surface. "Good question. I don't know. Maybe I was desperate?"
"Inuyasha's not here. He disappeared about a hundred years ago. Is that what you wanted to know?" Cold. He sounded so cold.
Surprised, she turned to face him. She hadn't even thought of Inuyasha. The minute she stepped through the door she thought only of him. She wondered if that was a sign. "No. I hadn't even thought of him until you mentioned it. How is he, anyways?" She knew her voice sounded bitter, but she couldn't help but add, "Happy, I'm sure, with Kikyo."
"That witch died shortly after you disappeared. He only had a few months with her before he tried the demon mating ritual. She wasn't worthy, and she died during the process." He was watching her closely, as if waiting to see how she'd react. "He chose the unworthy one."
Kagome wondered if that was supposed to be a compliment. In Sesshoumaru's eyes, she supposed it was. She smiled at him and took a step closer. "I suppose he did. I want to feel sorry for him, but after all this time..." she shrugged. "I'm not sure I can feel anything for him."
He studied her, frowning. "How is that over five hundred years passed, and you are still young?"
She blinked, surprised. That's right. He never knew where she really came from, did he? "Eh... well, you see... You know I was a miko back then, right?"
"You are still a miko." He stated, coolly watching her.
"I guess so. I haven't felt like one since I've been back. But when I possessed the Shikon no Tama, it granted me access to the past. The truth was, even though I was able to see you all five hundred years ago, I'm still merely thirty-two. For all those years when I was younger, I have been able to travel to the past to defeat Naraku."
His eyes narrowed just a bit, but other than that he didn't move. She didn't know what to expect, she should have expected him not to have change. He was still as calm and as emotionless as ever. "That explains your power then. Are you saying that you have not trained to be a miko since you've returned to this time? You seem to powerful for that to be possible."
"I've trained myself on what I've learned from Kaede and I think I've managed to perfect many things, but that's as far as I've gone. I've had to do it in private, since people here aren't very welcoming to people who are different, which I'm sure you know." Kagome leaned back against the window, and idly wondered if he'd be mad since she was sure she was leaving smudges on the glass.
"Why are you here?" He demanded suddenly. "Do not fool yourself if you think I will allow you to make me a replacement for Inuyasha."
Kagome was solemn, studying him - really studying him. He must be just as curious as she about each other. Because she knew just as much as he did that, after all these years, they were most likely the only survivors of what had happened all those years ago. No one would be able to carry memories of what had happened quite like they could. Maybe he was desperate too. But... "Sesshoumaru. You are in no way a replacement for Inuyasha. You never could be, and I'd never want you to be. Inuyasha is someone who is in my past. The only thing I'm offering right now is friendship."
After a few moments of studying each other, he nodded and gestured towards a separate set of doors. "Dinner is nearly complete."
And that, she decided, was his way of letting her in. She followed without hesitation, glad that this one small piece of her childhood was willing to spend time with her.
They spent the rest of the evening talking in low voices, reliving the past and telling Kagome some of what Sesshoumaru had been up to these past five hundred years, and Kagome indulged in telling him of her life in the present, excluding Hojo. She didn't need to embarrass and humiliate herself in front of him more than she had already from that morning. She suspected he already knew something, but was tactful enough not to say anything. Something Inuyasha would have never done.
The thought cheered her and she smiled more, leaving the house with a smile on her face and a promise for another meeting. Over the next couple of weeks, Kagome met with Sesshoumaru again and again, feeling herself heal not just on the outside, but on the inside too. Sesshoumaru was a man of honor. If these little meetings of theirs continued and they started calling it dating, he would break if off with her if he ever sought attentions from another woman.
She was glad she was with him. He had a dry sense of humor that she didn't always get, but was grateful for. He didn't exactly open doors or pull out chairs for her, but he walked slower so she'd be able to keep up, and never seemed to lose his patience. She didn't talk with Hojo and she didn't try to, and ignored all his attempts to contact her. Her time with Sesshoumaru was cherished, and it gave her time to heal, so she felt comfortable enough one day to talk to him about it while they met for coffee.
"You'll probably think me pathetic." She toyed with her cappuccino, swirling the foam around with her spoon.
He merely waited, watching her. He knew that she'd tell him eventually as long as he didn't try to interrupt.
"That first day we met up with each other, I had been coming home from a bachelorette party. My best friend Eri's. I had found my fiancé together with her in a private room and nearly naked, and obviously you know the result."
He still only stared at her, those golden eyes of his seeing everything.
She fidgeted. "You think I'm weak, don't you?"
"No. I just think you pick weak men." He still watched her, and Kagome stared down at his hand resting on the table and pulled in all the courage she possessed and reached for it. It was the first physical touch of their relationship.
"Until now."
A smile ghosted so fleetingly across his lips she barely caught it, but there was no mistaking his small nod and the tightening of his strong fingers over hers. "Until now."
Knowing he didn't like public displays of affection, she resisted bringing his hand to her cheek in her own show of affection, and merely bowed her head so her bangs hid the tears of happiness in her eyes, but couldn't wipe off her silly smile.
They spent a few more blissful weeks together, and Kagome assumed that's the reason how she should have known things were about to go the shitter. As they were walking down the street together in the more ritzier part of town, Kagome enjoying an ice cream cone as she regaled Sesshoumaru about her writing career and how she was going to kill off a character in a most interesting way, that she heard voices she never wanted to hear again.
"Kagome?"
She froze, unconsciously leaning up against Sesshoumaru as she stared. "Inuyasha?"
His gaze strayed to his brother, his eyes narrowing. "Sesshoumaru?"
"Kagome?"
Weak, she let her ice cream cone fall and watched it drop in the garbage, then lifted her eyes up again. "Hojo."
She felt Sesshoumaru's hand slip into hers, and it was the first public display of affection he's ever given her, and she squeezed back, grateful he felt enough for her to want to lend her his strength. She managed to smile thinly. "Hello, Hojo, Inuyasha. How have you been? It's been a long time."
Inuyasha was already bubbling with agitation, and she wondered why. Hojo was merely staring at her shocked, with a hurt look on his face as if he had been the martyr in their relationship, as if he were the one who had gotten hurt. That in itself finally roused anger within her. He had no right. He wasn't going to make her feel guilty for finally finding a strong man that actually cares for her, and he had the nerve to look hurt? Anger finally filled her, and she was grateful for it. For Sesshoumaru's sake, she held her dignity, and didn't lose her temper at Hojo.
"What are you two doing here? Together?" Inuyasha demanded, anger filling his voice.
"What business of it is yours?" Sesshoumaru spoke quietly, and then leaned down to murmur in her ear. "Do you want to leave?"
She did, but didn't want to appear weak in his eyes. She let him know with her smile she was happy, and appreciated his suggestion, but shook her head. "It would've happened sooner or later. We might as well get this over with."
She hoped he got the "we" part. She turned to Inuyasha and smiled brightly. "Wow, Inuyasha, you haven't changed a bit! You look so handsome in regular clothes! And Hojo, what a surprise? I didn't know you too knew each other."
"We only bumped into each other just now on accident. I didn't even know this guy's name was Hojo." Inuyasha jerked a thumb at Hojo and Kagome wondered how Inuyasha could still radiate so much energy, and how she could still feel it. "What are you doing with Sesshoumaru, Kagome? You know how I feel about it."
That did it. Sesshoumaru must have sensed it, for he let go of her hand and stepped back to watch. Her fists clenched together and she seemed almost feral how she bared her teeth at him, righteous anger flowing through her. "How you feel about it? You have no right to ask that of me, Inuyasha! If you still had those prayer beads I'd sit you to kingdom come! And you!" She stated, pointing a finger at Hojo. "Quit being so pathetic as to wear that hurt look on your face as if I'd done you wrong, you adulterous bastard! I'm seeing Sesshoumaru now, and neither of you have any right to any of it! So leave me alone and let me be happy for once!"
With that, she stormed away from them, knowing Sesshoumaru would find her if not follow her. She heard Inuyasha yelling something to Sesshoumaru, and stopped at a crosswalk and merely held up a hand to her eyes, breathing in deeply to calm her racing heart. Her anger faded the minute she felt Sesshoumaru's smooth hands cup her shoulders, and she leaned into his strength.
"Thank you. I don't know what I'd do without you."
"You'll probably see more of him. Now that he's found you he'll think he has some claim to you." He spoke quietly, and she felt his lips touch her ear in a small caress before he pulled away to stand by her side, his hands in his pockets.
"Well, I'll just have to set him straight, won't I" She gave him a smile, feeling relieved and lighter than she had in years. "You are with me, aren't you? We are together?"
They haven't had sex yet, and the only physical side to their relationship was to hold hands before a fire or the slightest touch of his hand on her elbow or the small of her back, leading her. Not even a kiss. She wasn't sure if he was treating her like a friend or girlfriend. She wanted to be his lover. She thought she was ready to. Hopefully he felt the same.
"Of course." He answered her, a smile ghosting his lips. That was all he said the rest of the ride back to his mansion, and Kagome wondered if she'd get enough courage to ask if she could stay the night.
Of course, that never happened. Sesshoumaru, ever the gentleman, dropped her off at the shrine with a promise of a call later. Kagome sighed, slowly making her way up the steps of the shrine. Her mother had already gotten back from her honeymoon, and didn't mind at all to find that Kagome was staying at the house. Even her new husband, Kenji, didn't seem to mind. Probably because she was rarely home anyways, unable to stand how lovey dovey they were. It was understandable, of course, since they just got married, but to have such happiness rubbed in her face during a difficult time had made her a little irritated.
Since she didn't want to go inside just yet, Kagome sat down at the base of the God Tree. And nearly jumped out of her skin when Inuyasha landed suddenly right next to her. When she was younger she had been used to such things, since Inuyasha's favorite spot was still above her, but years had made her forget. She glowered at him. "What are you doing here?"
His face suggested that, if he still had hanyou ears, they would be flat against his head in a sulk. "I haven't seen you in like, a century, and this is how you greet me?"
"I've gotten fifteen years to get over you, Inuyasha. In all that time, don't tell me you couldn't have come to see me if you wanted to." Kagome said dryly, looking away from him and back at the sky.
"I've been busy! Besides, all this time you've obviously been fooling around with Sesshoumaru." He sounded like a petulant child, and it was grating on Kagome's nerves.
Gritting her teeth, Kagome took a deep breath to calm herself. Then she said, very calmly, "Inuyasha, you do not have any right in thinking my relationship with Sesshoumaru is any of your business. Like you've said, you had five hundred years to come and see me. Quit acting like a child that just got his favorite toy taken away."
He sighed, frustrated. "It's not that, Kags. It's just, all these years I've had this set image of you in my mind. When I last saw you, crying. I guess I've always thought, despite you having grown, that you're still that girl with tears in her eyes. It was just a shock to see you happy is all, especially with Sesshoumaru."
Kagome looked over at him with a raised brow, amusement starting to show in her eyes. "Don't tell me that you two boys still haven't made up after all these years?"
He leaned back and crossed his arms behind his head. "Nah. In fact, this is the first time I've even seen him after about, oh, four hundred years?"
"Hmm." She closed her eyes, glad for the silence.
"Hey, Kagome." Inuyasha started. 'Hmm' was his only response, so he started up again. "In all these years did you... have you..."
Kagome opened her eyes, dreading his question. He shouldn't be able to think he could be so familiar with after what had happened.
"Have you ever even thought about me? I mean, you must have known that I was still alive." He finished, fidgeting a little.
"No, I didn't think that you were alive." Kagome started slowly, choosing her words carefully. "It took me a long time to get over you, Inuyasha. A lot of things have happened since I left. You couldn't have really expected me to still be hung up on you, did you?"
At his embarrassed look, she rolled her eyes. "Whatever. You had made your choice, Inuyasha. I got over it. And I'm with Sesshoumaru now, and never in my life will I betray him." The way you did to me.
It wasn't said, but it rang silently between them. Inuyasha sighed. "What on earth could Ice Man be thinking?"
Kagome frowned, wondering if she should be insulted. "That there is this attractive woman who's attracted to him? I'm not that bad you know."
He growled in frustration, running a hand through his hair. "I know, I'm sorry. It's just awkward, seeing you like this so suddenly."
"Kagome."
They both looked up to see Sesshoumaru standing by the shrine steps, a frown on his face as he watched them. Warmth filled Kagome, and she smiled slowly at him and watched as he relaxed. She turned to look at Inuyasha, blinking at the intense look he was giving her. Uncomfortable, she shifted. "What?"
"I've never seen you look like that."
She smiled again and stood, knowing that Sesshoumaru came for her for a reason. She wasn't going to go home tonight. "Happiness is a very good face to wear, Inuyasha. You should try it some time."
Inuyasha watched as they disappeared down the steps and contemplated her words. She was clearly over him, and he was a fool to think she'd always be a seventeen year old girl who fell in love with him all those years ago. But today she worn a face that he'd never before seen on her. Happiness. Smiling, he closed his eyes and stood, shoving his hands in his pockets.
Yes, happiness was indeed a very good face to wear sometimes.
/\\\\\\
I suck at endings, so there it is. This is actually the first Sesshoumaru/Kagome fic that I've written, and I've had it for a very long time since I couldn't think of how to end it. And Inuyasha story just didn't feel right without actually having Inuyasha in it, so I tweaked it a bit and this is what I came out with.
Give me some tips people, because any help in being a better writer is always needed.
Thanks!
Luna