"Angels, I need you right away. I have an important mission for you," said the sulky and sexy voice over the intercomm. One of the three women in the room pressed the reply button and spoke in her own imitation of a sexy voice.
"Be right there, Miroku," replied Monti, before shutting off the intercomm.
"Okay Angels, we haz our next mission. Let's go!" Phishbons said before standing and leading MontiK and Momo out of the room and up the stairs.
They entered the room, only to find no one sitting behind the desk. Before the three women could throw up their guard, one hand each found it's way to Momo's and Monti's derrieries. Before the hands had even left and started torwards a dual flanking caress on Phishbons, all three women had counterattacked to confront their molester.
With a back-kick, Phish connected her foot squarely with Miroku's groin. As she had been wearing high heels, he was now very much in pain. Before he could double over, Momo delievered a sharp elbow to his stomach, making all of the air in him come out in a *whoosh*. Finally, Monti delievered a roundhouse punch that smacked him in the nose, somehow not making it bleed, although he still slammed against the nearest wall.
As he was sliding down it, Miroku handed Monti a folder containing their mission paperwork. As he hit the ground and let darkness claim him, the three women perused the papers within the folder.
"Hmm, it seems that the half brother of the Lord of the Western Lands wants to kill his current girlfriend, and use her soul to help resurrect his former girlfriend," said Monti with a crossed eyebrow.
"Wow, what a jerkz! Althoughz I could seez wherez hez could wantz toz ifz shez iz a bitczh andz herz deadz girlfriendz waz nize," ranted Phish.
"I hate it when you get so upset that you speak in cat," muttered Momo.
"Sorriez!" replied Phish, bowing as she apologized.
"Angels, let's go!" said Monti.
The three of them raced up to the roof, climbed into their tripped out Kiowa Warrior helicopter gunship, painted bright pink with purple stripes and a crescent moon on the side, courtesy of their sponsor, the western lord himself, and took off torwards their destination.
* * *
Kagome hummed softly to herself while huffing and puffing, jogging along the forest trail. She was too focused on her own internal thoughts concerning her trouble with math however, when she was abruptly grabbed around her neck, lifted off of her feet, and thrown into the forest.
Slamming hard into the ground, her eyes exploded into stars and swirling ducks. Someone was hovering over her.
She opened her eyes and gasped to see Inuyasha standing over here in his usual clothes, but with a black cap over his doggy-ears.
"Kagome, I'm sorry I have to do this, but this can't wait any longer," spoke Inuyasha gruffly, standing aside to reveal Kikyo standing behind her.
Tears filled Kagome's eyes as she realized what he was talking about.
"Your soul belongs to me now...," said Kikyo as she advanced with her arms outstretched.
The sound of streaking fire entered the air. Inuyasha's ears twitched before he grabbed Kikyo and jumped backwards. A Hellfire missile zipped through where they had been standing, exploding a tree nearby.
"What the hell?" asked Inuyasha as he drew his sword. A bright pink helicopter gunship had appeared.
"Wind Scar!" yelled Inuyasha as he unleashed his attack against the helicopter. The helicopter tried to spin out of the way, but one of the lances of light energy sheared off it's tail rotor, leaving the helicopter to spin around into the ground helplessley.
"Well, that was random," remarked Kikyo as she came forward again to claim Kagome's soul.
Several booming sounds could be heard, followed by which several bullets struck Kikyo in the chest, hurling her backwards into Inuyasha.
"Yo bitch, stay the hell away from Kagome," said Monti, hefting her AK-74 as she moved into the clearing.
With startling speed, Inuyasha leapt over Kagome and Kikyo both, landing next to Monti, and with a brutal backhand, slapped Monti across the face, sending her barrel-rolling to the ground, her weapon flying through the air.
"Stupid wench," muttered Inuyasha as he looked down at Monti's knocked out form.
"Hah, as if bullets could harm me," laughed Kikyo as she looked at the small dings in her clay figure.
"No, but this might," came another female voice.
Inuyasha and Kikyo both turned as Phish fired off the Dragon Anti-Tank missile, the whooshing sound filling the clearing as it arced for Kikyo. Inuyasha grabbed her and jumped up for safety, but unlike the Hellfire, this missile was wireguided, so a mere course correction from Phish sent the missile arcing upwards.
It slammed into Kikyo, and exploded, throwing Inuyasha downwards into the ground. When the explosion faded, all that remained of Kikyo was a cloud of red clay dust that was settling onto the ground.
Momo finally arrived, and seeing Monti lying on the ground knocked out, flew into a rage. Her eyes turned green as her skin glowed pink. In the mere blink of an eye, her muscles and body had expanded, transforming her into the Incredibly Smexy Shehulk. Momo then turned and ran back to the downed helicopter, leaving Phish to deal with the recovering Inuyasha.
"You...little...bitch...," growled the hanyou lowly as he rosed from the ground. He flew into action, unsheathing Tetsuiga and leaping for Phish.
"I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU!" yelled Inuyasha as he was about to cleave Phish in half, who stood there startled and afraid....
"OSUWARI!" came Kagome's yelling voice. The hanyou smashed into the ground at Phish's feet gouging out a crater three feet deep.
Before phish could sigh in relief, Inuyasha started to rise again.
"Kagome, when I'm...through with these two...I am so going to rape then butcher you......," he struggled to say as he rose.
Phish's eyes grew wide as she saw something from behind the hanyou, and quickly moved backwards a few paces.
"Heh, you should run wench, because as soon as I recover, I will slaug...," he managed to get out before Momohulk slammed the remains of the helicopter gunship on top of Inuyasha, driving him back into the crater. Only his head, sword, and bottom of his legs were still visible.
Before Momo had moved away, Monti came flying in to straddle the hanyou's neck, her eyes ablaze in fiery abandon.
"Bitch, did you just hit me?" yelled Monti in question, one hand holding her bruised cheekbone.
"Yeah, and I'll do it again, just as soon as I..." started Inuyasha before both of Monti's hands wrapped around his head. With a sudden extertion, she broke Inuyasha's neck, snapping his head around a full one hundred eighty degrees. His eyes, now staring upwards, betrayed his shock at her strength when he died.
Her anger leaving her body, Momo transformed back into normal, and Phish came to stand by the two of them.
"Servez himz rightz," she said in satisfaction.
"Indeed. But what to do about poor Kagome now?" asked Monti, turning to look at the battered girl kneeling on the ground, tears still streaming down her face. Although the betrayal and attempt on her life still stung, she was still hurt even more by Inuyasha's death, as her love for him had yet had time to fade away with it's betrayal.
"I will take care of her, and heal her," said a familiar voice from behind them. The three ladies turned to see their sponsor, Sesshomaru, coming up behind them, his corporate helicopter sitting on the park grass behind him.
"Oh Sesshomaru..." wailed Kagome as she ran into his arms, finally having a familiar and friendly non-betraying face to cry on.
"Let's go Angels," said Monti, leaving the two of them to be by themselves.
The three of them climbed into Sesshomaru's corporate helicopter, hijacking as they kicked the pilot, Jaken out of it, before flying back to headquarters, and a job well done.
The End
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A/N: As always, I don't own Inuyasha, Charley's Angels, the Incredible Hulk, etc etc. And reviews are still appreciated.