Hello there.
I have read this one,and yes,you still have a long way to go.But,this is very good.Great plot.Great story,even though the grammar mistakes messed it a bit.Hey,nobody's perfect.Even someone who wrote fanfics,poems,lyrics and stories like me for a long time makes mistakes sometimes.Here's my advise.Everytime you finished a paragraph,try reading it all over again once or twice.You can easily spot some grammar mistakes if there are any.And of course,if you'd like,find a beta reader.It'll help.
Easily said,even though there are grammar errors here,I had fun reading it.Thank you for entertaining me,and I'd be looking forward to more.
Sincerely,
Nakamura Mizuiro Chiaki
hit'n'run (Chapter 1) - Fri 15 Jul 2011
| You still have a long way to go in writing. You have so many mistakes, you really needed a beta badly. Many times I had no idea what you were saying. So keep practicing.
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