I'm not really sure what to say, you were right about the first chapter not being happy. The chapters afterwards though are quite good I can't find anything wrong grammer or structure wise, I just came across this story today and I'm already loving it! I hope you get some more done soon!
Just so you know, smelt is a fish, and has nothing to do with the word smell, present, past or active tense. If you were to use the word smell in another form, it would be smelled or smelly, along those lines. Smelting is the melting of ores, so this use will not be proper either. Hope this helps with your future writings!
I am also enjoying your story, so I hope you won't take this review offensively.
o.o yanno, they are all really playing with fire, the temper on those 2 are notorious and evil when they want to be, most of them might die in fact! Hachi's the only smart one, get the hell out of dodge!
I am loving the way Kouga is playing matchmaker with Kagome and Sesshomaru. And now, he has an accomplice in Shippou. It would be nice to see how the Kamis deal with Inuyasha's soul and their punishment. Or better yet, have his father and mother give him a tongue lashing in the afterlife. He most likely might end up in Hell for what he did to Kagome. Or, if he's lucky, end up being reincarnated as a child of Kagome and Sesshomaru some time in the future. Who knows what will happen except you? Anyway, I'm looking forward to Kouga's matchmaker scheme coming to fruition. Can't wait.
good chapter!
good update! though i kinda hope that Ayame clobers kouga for it before helping! still very interesting!
Except for the fact that I hate Inuyasha turning into a rapist I love this story! I particularly love how KOUGA is the one playing matchmaker. :eyes dance: I'm really glad that he's being such a friend, and not a romantic contender.
Need more Shippou involvement though. I appreciate the explanation that he's being quieter because of time spent with Sesshomaru for why there's been so little mention of him, but I'd still like more especially since he's Right There. Hopefully Kouga's new plot will involve him sufficiently. I'd also like to know HIS thoughts on the matter of Kagome and Sesshomaru.
It's really too bad that Kagome lost her miko powers. Or maybe... they're simply hidden? :crosses fingers: I can hope, can't I?
I wonder if we'll learn the Shikon's reasoning for shifting Inuyasha's dark wish. Right now it seems like a bad plot device, honestly, with no decernable reason why it should have happened as it did. I realize not all answers in life or stories are always forthcoming, but being this Is a story there should be Something.
Thanks for writing!
mah, kouga's playing a dangerous game, if things don't work out the way he hopes they will the one that'll be hurt most is Kagome and Ayame. As for Sess he needs to own up to it, and get kagome before kouga does! Also i dunno i cant see kagoem getting over being raped twice into agreeing to court someone days after or even during one of these attacks. i some how also see it so that Inuyasha should have had to suffer more. not saying i hate inuyasha, it's just that, with the character change from grumpy a-hole with a heart, to sadistic rapest asshat, it just seems like it would have been worse. or should have been.
I knew things weren't going to end well for our misguided hanyou. He had it coming from the get-go. I wonder what the Kami have in store for him for repeatedly raping Kagome. A shame and a waste. Anyway, I'm looking forward to what Kouga has cooked up for Kagome and Sesshomaru. I feel bad for Shippou too. He's going to be traumatized for a long time. Looking forward to the next chapter.
I liked the way you brought Kouga into the mix,especially with his intentions of making Sesshomaru. At least he's not as bullheaded as he's usually portrayed in other stories and that he's actually going to mate with Ayame. I still say things are not going to end well for Inuyasha. I wonder what Kagome has in store for him now that she's a demon. Looking forward to the next chapter.
Very interesting beginning to this. I can understand where Inuyasha's coming with the subjugation beads and the many 'sits' he's endured like some pet that needs to be disciplined all the time but in no way does it justify his actions towards Kagome. She does not deserve to be treated like some plaything. And another thing, KIKYOU WAS ALREADY DEAD WHEN KAGOME CAME INTO THE PICTURE! And the wish to be a full-fledged demon transferring onto Kagome was priceless. I have a feeling things will not turn out well for the hanyou. Next chapter please.
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