Moonbeam and Ebony by royalbk

A Love Before Time

This was my very first story in the Inuyasha fandom. I remember this fondly. xDD

Disblaimer: Sesshoumaru and Kagome don't belong to me...never have, never will. Such a shame! (pouts) This one shot is made with the song A Love Before Time by Coco Lee...except that I chose not to make it a songfic so as not to go into gray areas that frankly no one wants to see. ^^; You are all most encouraged to listen to the song while reading this though. :D

~*~*~*~

A Love Before Time

 ~*~*~*~

Left, right, left, right, left, hesitate, right...

Really, it was stupid to feel afraid of speaking her heart. After all, she wore it on her sleeve most of her time and it had never bothered her at all.

Kagome sighed wearily and tilted her head slightly upwards, watching the play of lights through the bottle green of the leaves. Only the Sengoku Jidai could look so peaceful...so untouched by human technology.

The chirping birds, running streams and vivid colors of everything surrounding her seemed so new to her; especially after coming from modern Tokyo where everything was modern, gray and ran by machines and gadgets, which would baffle people and demons from this era.

Beneath her bare feet -a luxury she liked to indulge from time to time- the grass blades were soft and delicate, tickling ever so often. Around her the wind blew softly, bringing with it the perfumed scent of the cherry blossoms and the warmth of late summer.

Kagome loathed even thinking of going back to polluted Tokyo...but with each step that lead her closer to her destination, to revealing her feelings to Sesshoumaru, her heart felt heavier and heavier by the prospect of hearing denial straight from his mouth.

Six months ago, the unthinkable had occurred when Sesshoumaru had come forth expressing his desire to join their makeshift group in search of Naraku and the Shikon jewel.

He had been very vague about other motifs, choosing to keep for himself like he always did and it was with great effort that she had managed to convince Inuyasha to accept his brother's offer. The half demon had always been too pigheaded for his good.

It had been a dark time for all of them. Hunting Naraku with little to no efforts had started to take its toll on the entire group and not only that - she had been trying to get over her first love, Inuyasha had been mourning Kikyou's death and Sango and Miroku had fallen into depression, fueling their belief that they could never destroy Naraku and his minions no matter how much they tried.

Shippou had been caught in the middle despite everyone's efforts.

A vicious circle if she could call it that.

Sesshoumaru's arrival into the group had been the wisest decision Kagome had ever made.

Rin's innocence and cheerfulness.

Jaken's sharp tongue and haughty manner.

Ah-Un, the two headed dragon, capable of being both a weapon in battle as well as a playmate for both Shippou and Rin.

Sesshoumaru, the ruthless demon Lord, a complete antithesis of his brother and yet so devilishly compelling in his own quiet way.

The similarities stopped at the snow-white hair because in Kagome's opinion, even their eyes were a different shade of pure gold.

It had been an uneasy alliance at first, the children providing an unsteady bridge between the two parties. Inuyasha had sought any occasion to start a conflict with his brother; Jaken had kept throwing insults at both her and Sango to the point where even Miroku's temper flared and he was forced to beat the toad into the ground.

As for the taiyoukai...well, one might say that trying to initiate a conversation was either a willing decision to make it one sided and monosyllabic, or a brave attempt at feeling like an insect under the microscope!

Kagome had been close to setting the label 'kids, don't try this at home!' when someone shook the kaleidoscope that was her world and altered everything.

One night.

~*~*~*~

She started slightly but he didn't look at her, choosing instead to gaze at the infinity above them unblinkingly.

It was a clear night in the Feudal Era and stars littered the entire expanse of the sky, lighting it up beautifully.

And that wasn't the only beautiful thing -or should she say person- she could see. It was the first time Kagome had ever seen the demon Lord look so mellow, peaceful...angelique.

He seemed to attract the light around him without even trying. While the night reflected in his hair and clothes - highlighting the white until it seemed silver and blue- the moon shone in the center of his unnatural gaze creating white, hot sparks of energy.

He was ethereal.

Kagome suddenly felt like an intruder in this mystical space.

"Forgive me Lord Sesshoumaru." She folded her hands self-consciously and hoped he didn't notice. "I didn't mean to intrude...I'll leave you to your quiet and peace now. Goodnight."

The Taiyoukai didn't seem to think so. Before she could even take two steps out of the clearing, he decided to honor her with an answer...and her blood burned with righteous anger.

"Are you afraid of me miko?"

He spoke in low tones, his expression calm and his eyes faintly shadowed in the darkness. If her temper hadn't been sparking, Kagome might've been surprised at the undertones of warm amusement hidden beneath the surface of those sun kissed eyes.

Sesshoumaru was toying with her!

Kagome tried to keep her voice controlled when she answered but if it had been anyone else, he or she might've been suffering from frostbite already.

"You are too presumptuous Lord Sesshoumaru. While I do admit that I am only human and that, yes, I do fear certain things, I certainly do not fear you." She sniffed and crossed her arms over her chest. "Perhaps I should be just as presumptuous as you are my lord. Would you rather if I intrude upon your personal time and space with no semblance of respect?"

Her voice went from icy to dry in a matter of seconds and Kagome could almost swear that the Taiyoukai's eyebrows had gone up a notch.

Since he didn't appear to want to kill her either, Kagome gave herself an inward pat on the back for handling things so smoothly. For all his knowledge and important position in the demon world, Sesshoumaru was certainly not used to a female answering him back. Certainly not in such eloquent terms.

'One bad thing in this era...no women's rights. Oh and no soap either. Not that he seems to lack in cleanliness...that type of pretty hair should be banned. It might be immoral, should be illegal and is certainly a disgrace for women around the world.' Kagome's mind supplied mutinously.

Sesshoumaru was studying her intently, eyes locked with hers, and the raven-haired miko fought the urge to squirm. She had the feeling he was looking into her very soul...that he knew she was crazy after chocolate, and anything pertaining to the delicious concoction, and hated rubber duckies and steamed spinach.

He made her feel naked and vulnerable.

Of course that was preposterous but if he didn't stop looking at her like that -might she add that they had been staring each other down for the last few minutes- she was going to give him a piece of her mind!

"You are an intriguing woman Kagome. How my brother ever managed to gain your loyalty is perplexing."

Shock. Pandemonium. Hell had frozen over.

Kagome opened her mouth, glacial eyes melting into pool of dark sapphire, and closed it immediately...from lack of words of course. Her brain was caught between in a loop and the same thoughts seemed to run around in circles.

Sesshoumaru, Taiyoukai of the Western Lands, had spoken two sentences -an admirable feat- and had somehow managed to include her name and several praises in it.

Kagome had the distinct impression that he was amused with her reaction - again.

She really needed to sit down.

~*~*~*~

Being the type that always did what she set out to do, Kagome had indeed sat down. Opposite the demon Lord, with only a few feet separating them again.

They...scratch that...she had ended talking a good part of the night with the least expected person in the world. Kagome had been careful to hide her true heritage from Sesshoumaru (because telling a ruthless, cold, handsome - no, bad Kagome! - demon that she came from five hundred years in the future was not on the list of her to do's) but had conversed with him about everything and anything beneath the sun and moon.

Mostly, it had been one sided, with Sesshoumaru softly speaking from time to time to inquire or correct her about certain things, but Kagome had discovered that when he wasn't trying to kill her or Inuyasha and wasn't showing his hate for humans, he could actually be...amiable? Courteous?

She had tried to label this new side of him, but to her Sesshoumaru was still a mystery. Maybe she could identify him with the symbol of his house...

The moon. It was there...immortal, as old as the world and forever unchanging in her eyes but like everything out there, it also had two sides.

The light side was always in place for everyone to see - an emotionless mask that was as cold as it was beautiful. It spun rays of silver and gold and glowed unnaturally in the darkness...just like Sesshoumaru. Then there was the dark side. Hidden, secretive and mysterious. A complete opposite of its counterpart in both appearance and personality.

Sitting in her futon that night, Kagome wondered if that was the case with the Taiyoukai and if she hadn't been too harsh in judging him beforehand.

The next day, things were back to normal. Kagome traveled with her friends and tried her best not to sneak glances at the demon Lord walking behind them, his bored mask firmly in place. As usual.

Yet that night had changed a great deal of things in their 'relationship' even if nothing was visible. Kagome found herself wishing that she could talk to him again...it was so liberating to have someone with such knowledge of everything.

They weren't friends; they weren't even in each other's good graces most of the times. Enemies turned acquaintances and then forced allies, but it didn't matter to her.

As long as she could talk about something else than Naraku, the Shikon jewel, death and wars that personally affected her, she was fine with it.

He hadn't killed her that first night and Kagome didn't think he wanted to dirty his hands with human blood so the following night, she had gone on her usual walk with every intention of finding the demon Lord again.

And the following night too...and the night after that...and the night after that.

It became a sort of tradition -at least for her- and Sesshoumaru didn't seem to mind the company. Sometimes they would sit in comfortable silence, other times he would listen to her rant about Inuyasha's stupidity and hardheadedness (he seemed to particularly like that one) and sometimes, albeit rarely, he would actually speak instead of listening.

Kagome had never imagined such a thing possible and despite the fact that they would most likely go their separate ways someday, she felt a giddiness inside her that had been long washed away by duties and stupid silver haired hanyous.

Everything had happened gradually and she hadn't even realized it until too late.

Gradually she had stopped thinking of Inuyasha in more than a brotherly way.

Gradually she had regained the long lost smile and found the eagerness to feel young once more.

Gradually she had fallen for Sesshoumaru.

How that had been possible, she still wasn't sure. All Kagome knew was that, once, she had caught him staring at her with a hooded expression.

In broad daylight...when Sango, Miroku and Inuyasha were present.

His mouth had been set in a firm line; eyes narrowed and intense burning through her defenses and making her heart flutter madly in her chest. Kagome could've sworn at that moment that Sesshoumaru was frustrated about something and had tried to decipher the muddled emotions beneath the surface of his golden eyes by gazing intently back.

Something had flickered in those bottomless depths and then his expression was shuttered and he had already turned away from her...leaving Kagome feeling surprised, distressed and strange...strangely hot.

It hadn't been the only time she had caught him either...or maybe he had wanted her to see. See and understand.

Kagome smiled sadly to herself and stopped at the edge of the clearing, immediately seeking the white clad figure she knew would be waiting for her.

"Naraku is dead and the Shikon Jewel is restored. I have made my wish and Inuyasha and Kikyou are free to be together once more."

She knew that she didn't have to tell him this. After all, he and Inuyasha had been the ones to slay the spider demon and he...he always knew what she was going to do next anyway.

Then again always was a fickle word because not even Sesshoumaru could predict her future actions.

"Indeed. All turned out well it seems."

Birds chirped and the warm sun beat down upon them and for a moment Kagome could grasp the irony of life. A miko and a Taiyoukai. Who would've ever thought such a thing was possible?

Apparently Inuyasha hadn't found it so hilarious when he had, surprisingly, figured it out by himself. Apparently Sango and Miroku had also been aware of the changes in her for quite some time...they all supported her but Kagome was no stranger to the mistrust shining in their eyes.

Merely a reflection of her own but from different reasons.

Kagome swallowed thickly and pushed back the terrifyingly depressing feeling rising in her gut. There would be time for that, after saying what she had come to say.

"The high council has been pressing me to find a mate of suitable heritage for me. The other Lords, it seems, are becoming restless to find me a soul mate...how nonsensical." He advanced towards her and Kagome was reminded of a large, powerful feline. Another irony of life.

"But they will not get their way as I am not as easily persuaded and threatened as my father had."

Kagome had expected this and knew what Sesshoumaru was telling her, but her heart was still breaking. If one listened carefully, he or she was bound to hear the crystalline sound of it falling apart.

She couldn't become his. No one would accept a mere human as the Lady of the Western Lands and mate of the feared Taiyoukai. Such a thing would most likely start wars...it would decrease his value and worthiness in front of others of his kind and rank.

It hurt...that she couldn't deny; but after all she had come here determined to hear this answer from his mouth hadn't she? It was either this or plain rejection from his part.

Perhaps it would've been better had he just rejected her and her love for him...if he hadn't wanted her at all. Then it would only be herself that was hurt - and that wasn't something new for her.

Taking one step forward, she leaned against him and cupped his cheek tenderly, feeling the thrill of not being rejected or denied his touch. In fact Sesshoumaru seemed to welcome her and even wrapped his one arm around her, splaying his fingers against her lower back with a gentleness he rarely ever showed.

"Thank you for telling me this. I will..."

"I want you to come with me Kagome." He cut her off abruptly and even though his voice was terse, his expression was blank and his eyes were carefully guarded. "If I can not make you my mate, I still wish for you to become mine...I will give you immortality and make you mine one way or another."

For a few moments Kagome felt indescribable joy and happiness and her traitorous mind weaved dreams of happiness. Only for a few moments though, before she pushed all the wild emotions in the back of her head.

This was truly cruel...how could he actually want to make her his mistress? Did he not know that it would make her happy to be with him no matter what? Or perhaps he did and was using such a proposal in his advantage.

Sesshoumaru was being deliberately unfair to both her and his possible mate.

It was with great effort that she finally managed to compose herself and look her love straight in the eye.

"I will not become a mistress Sesshoumaru...no matter how tempting your offer sounds." She finished ruefully, finding it hard to disengage herself from his arms and move away.

How could she when all she wanted was to throw herself against him and tell him that she would become his everything if he wanted it? Sesshoumaru was making her weak against her will.

Ice flickered in her Lord's eyes and then there was burning, all-consuming fire. Sesshoumaru stepped back and leaned against a shaded oak tree, his posture demanding respect and submission despite the casual position he had adopted.

"I will not give you up Kagome. I will come back for you and when that happens, I will make sure that you come with me. I do not give up so easily on what is mine..."

Kagome almost choked on the tears she had been holding back since the beginning.

'But you have no choice Sesshoumaru...forgive me.'

Time stopped for a moment and then Kagome turned on her heel and started running back towards the Bone Eater's well. She had memorized every detail of him and knew that her memory of Sesshoumaru was going to be the only thing to keep her going from now on.

In her memory, he was perfect and immortal. His skin was pale and fair; the bone structure of his face and hand was angular and appeared to belong to a predator and not a human being...she could still remember the angle of his cheekbones and jaw and decided to herself that it gave him an aristocratic appearance and made him look otherworldly.

His eyes were almond-shaped, a few shades darker than melted gold, and his mouth was thin. The jagged stripes and crescent moon on his face contrasted deeply with long, pale hair and pristine clothes.

The Bone Eater's well was right ahead of her and Kagome finally allowed herself to cry...it really wasn't fair. Every chance of happiness had been denied and taken one way or another before she could grasp it.

Sesshoumaru was his father's son and she was her mother's daughter...but at least their parents had had their share of happiness, short-lived as it was.

'I do not give up so easily on what is mine...'

She slung her feet over the rim of the well and hesitated, turning her head sideways and glancing backwards. The separation was almost physically painful for her.

Sesshoumaru, Inuyasha, Shippou and Rin, Sango and Miroku...even Kikyou and Kouga made her heart ache with bitterness and anger.

"I love you."

Spreading her arms wide, Kagome let herself fall forward and into the comforting darkness of the well.

'Farewell Sesshoumaru. Don't forget me.'

~*~*~*~

It was strange.

She had sat under this tree when she had realized that she loved Inuyasha and, six months after 'the incident' as she had dubbed it, she still sat under this tree...mourning what couldn't be.

If she hadn't been so depressed, Kagome might've taken the time to consider the melodrama that was her life. She had been a mere schoolgirl when she had discovered the Bone Eater's well and she never would've guessed that it would change her life so drastically.

Monsters, demons, gods, revenge and wars...it was all part of a day's work after she broke the Shikon jewel. Then again, so were the friends she had managed to make throughout time...the experiences she had acquired and that had molded her into the woman she was now.

Nineteen, had her heart broken twice (once of her own volition), had no real friends left in modern Tokyo and no desire to go play the social butterfly even at her mother's kind insistences.

People knew nothing about the truth. They knew nothing but fashion, gossip, their own needs and wants and the modern world that held no place for the breathtaking beauty of nature. Due to their legacy, her family had maintained a certain bond with the spiritual and natural world out there.

Still...

She missed someone who could understand her, someone she could identify with. Kagome missed Sango's sisterly affection, Miroku's calm presence, Inuyasha's roughness and Shippou and Rin's childish innocence...she missed Sesshoumaru.

Kagome exhaled a visible puff of cold air and extended her hand forward to catch the snowflakes falling all around her. Her entire yard was covered in snow and even her miko outfit was starting to get wet and soggy.

The distraction didn't work and the raven-haired woman felt her thoughts return to the man she loved. Had he found anyone yet? Had he felt betrayed about her sudden departure and her apparent discard of his feelings?

She had instructed Inuyasha not to tell his brother about her whereabouts - not that Sesshoumaru could come after her now that the power of the Shikon jewel had forever sealed the portal.

Tears welled in her eyes and Kagome buried her face in one hand, desperately trying to hold back the onslaught of emotions threatening to tear her apart.

It was still mind numbing to know that she couldn't fix her mistakes and right the wrongs. So many nights she had woken up, plagued by dreams of him, and jumped out of bed with every intention of going back to Sengoku Jidai, only to remember that the well was closed and that second chances didn't exist.

Not for her.

Not with him.

If not for her mother's help and moral support, Kagome didn't think she would have the strength to rise out of bed and face the world.

Yet she did...she went to college everyday and did her homework mindlessly; she listened to teachers talk about history and snorted to herself, realizing that the most important details -the people that had created the present- were nothing more than blurred faces and technical data to be taught and learned by heart. She listened to the girls sitting behind her talk about cute boys, pink nail polish and silly dreams of milk and honey...and hoped to retain her sanity.

She hoped.

She wanted.

She needed...

Sesshoumaru.

"Are you partial to killing yourself by freezing, or do I always come in the least opportune moments...Kagome?"

She froze and along with her, the tears that had been falling between the parted fingers.

God, if this was punishment then it was the cruelest he could've dealt her.

Slowly, deliberately slow, the miko raised her head and watched the apparition before her with wide, blue eyes. It wasn't...it couldn't...but it was and he hadn't changed from the last time she had seen him.

His eyes were dark gold; his hair was pristine and pretty and his features held the same angular quality that took her breath away. However, the markings and elfish ears seemed to have dematerialized (as he now possessed very human ears) and his dark pants, black trench coat and royal purple shawl wrapped around his neck, portrayed him as a resident of modern Tokyo.

It took her brain and heart a second to make the connection, to accept that the man that had tormented her thoughts for the last six months was in front of her, and then she was running full speed and launching herself in his arms with all the force her petite body could muster.

She expected him to push her away, denounce her for her heartless betrayal, but once again Sesshoumaru surprised her by wrapping his arms around her waist and holding her sobbing form and...wait arms? He had two?

"Sesshoumaru...your arm." Kagome murmured through her tears, trying to pull away and have a better look at his grown limb. His arms tightened, becoming steel bands that wouldn't allow her to budge an inch.

That was fine with Kagome, as she very much liked her new position. Her nose was buried in his chest and he was so solid and real and she was so tired, so weary of being alone and unloved.

"You left."

If there were any strength left in her, Kagome would've stiffened in surprise. He was blunt, but then again she shouldn't have expected anything from the Lord of the former Western Lands.

"I had to...I couldn't stay knowing that all I could ever be in the eyes of your people was a disgrace and an enemy. I am not one to accept a relationship on those terms anyway."

"I would've given you immortality."

"You would've," Kagome's voice was weary and she was practically leaning against him fully because her feet had grown numb from the cold - and he was comfortable and practically curled around her. "And I wouldn't have been any better than all those women throwing themselves at you for money and power...I would've been the mistress you would've gotten bored for the sheer reason that she was no different that any other gold digging demoness or human."

She felt his lips tilt upwards slightly in the crook of her neck and shivered when his hot breath ghosted over the fine hairs of her nape.

"You're acting awfully strange. If I'm not hallucinating, and I think I'm perfectly fine despite the fact that my brain has frozen over, you just smiled...and kissed the side of my neck. Shouldn't you be trying to kill me?"

"Do you want me too?"

"Not particularly...I'd like to see my next birthday. But I am human...and I did run out on you."

"Miko, I do believe that you are baiting me." Sesshoumaru's voice was dry and his eyes flared brightly when they caught hers. "I have not waited for five hundred years to find you just so I can kill you slowly and painfully."

There were two things passing through Kagome's mind at that moment. He had been searching for her and damned be the hanyou and his loud mouth for babbling her secret out...she was sure that the Taiyoukai had somehow baited the words out of him.

"Then why did you search for me my Lord?"

The almost imperceptible twinkle in his eyes made Kagome's stomach twist in a funny manner.

"I don't believe you. I lied to you and traveled five hundred years in the future to hide from you."

"No human is perfect. And you are more than just an ordinary human Kagome...just because others couldn't see you for what you were -a better of your species- does not mean that I share their inane ideas."

"I've traveled with a loud-mouth hanyou, a bad tempered taijya, a lecherous monk and an orphan kitsune and I am far from perfect myself. I have flaws...and stop flattering me. Already one too many shocks for today as it is."

There he went with that fathomless smile of his again. Had the passing of years finally made the demon Lord daft? Didn't he get that she was a horrible person?

"I'm a miko and an enemy of your kind and..."

"My kind is almost extinct and even if they weren't, their opinions would hold no interest to me anymore. It has been a long time since I have been forced to listen to their incessant nonsense and I find myself tired of waiting to claim what I want."

One arm circled her waist and the other went beneath her knees. "Do you have any objections to being swept of your feet miko?"

Kagome only gaped at him incredulously. If he was baiting her again, then so help her God...

"N-no!"

"Good. Now, I will get inside and your mother will see that you don't catch your death. No future mate of mine will be stuck in bed for weeks nursing a cold."

She could make no objections when he carried her inside the shrine and were her mother was waiting...smiling in a cheerfully alarming fashion.

"So...when is the wedding?"

Kagome really, really wanted to hit someone.

End.