I'm not sure if I'm reading too much into your concept, but is this supposed to be an afterlife experience? Perhaps like Kagome is a ghost on a physical train, or the train is a figment of her mind and Sesshoumaru's spirit is helping her "off the train"? I have a tendency to see everything symbolically, so if this is a literal "odd girl on a train" then...um...yeah...

Your imagery was beautiful and the first person perspective poignant (wow...alliteration). I liked your allusion to Kagome's similar but weaker connection to Inuyasha. The way you've constructed this piece leaves much open to interpretation, which has me torn. A part of me wants to beg you to flesh it out, but another, stronger part appreciates this piece for exactly what it is, which is highly conceptual and cerebral, written solely for the beauty of her journey.

I really enjoyed the read and hope to see more from you!