Damnation! by aurora17

Chapter 1

<><><>"Sometimes even to live is an act of courage."<><><>

<><>-Lucius Annaeus Seneca<><>

Life. It can seem so unfair at times, but in reality nothing is fair. My life both began and ended on the same day, the day of my birth. Don't get me wrong I lived, but I was doomed from the time I took my first breath. For my father Lord Akiro of the northern lands had promised me to the son of the Lord Inutaisho. Now it wouldn't have been so bad if that was it, but that wasn't it. Lord Inutaisho and my father decided that it would be a good idea for us to spend some time together, to get to know each other, every year.

So almost every summer since the time of my birth I was sent to stay in the western lands in the same castle as the most infuriating boy ever to grace this planet.

Granted, as a child, he was adorable, but he didn't seem to have a very warm personality. I think it would be safe to say that out personalities are polar opposites. Where he is aloof and expressionless, I am fiery and emotional. To add to it he is rude. He has a serious superiority complex, even though we are equals, and he does not hesitate to insult me every chance he can get. That and he treats me as if I were a spoiled child.

I have long since given up hope that I would escape such a fate, as becoming his mate. It would seem that whatever I did in my past lives was pretty bad and the gods have chosen to punish me severely. I have appealed to both my father and his. They have both told me the same thing. That this is a good match and that I should try harder. I think that I have already tried hard enough. I think that he is the one who needs to try harder, after all, he hasn't put forth the smallest of an efforts to make this easier. He has always made it quite clear that he wants nothing to do with it. Even though his sentiments mirror my own, I can say that I have at least put forth an effort. The only reason I am going through with this whole thing now is, is because it means so much to my father and his.

Yes, I'm going to condemn myself to be unhappily mated for the rest of my life.

At least I got a taste of freedom before I began the journey that would be the end of my joy. These last four years I was excused from having to visit my intended because I was abroad. My trips over the last few years were taken so that I would become more knowledgeable about other places. Which would make me a better ruler. I saw it as a chance for just a little freedom. Unfortunately all good things come to an end.

So here I am on the back of my noble steed moving ever closer to my new home. Oh yes, I am now eighteen years of age. Meaning that I am old enough to finish what was started so many years before.

I could have run and been there much faster, but my mother said that we were in no hurry, so I am riding my horse and they are in a carriage. I will be able to return home for visits, but that is of little consolation. Though I will readily admit that I love the western lands and will have no trouble living here. Every time I come here I am awed by the land's untamed beauty. These lands are to my home as I am to my mate-to-be, total opposites.

The northern lands are cold, and covered in a mask of snow that hides every things true form. The western lands are alive with activity, they are warm, they are full of color, and full of life.

I truly will not mind overmuch living here, but I will mind who I am to be living with. I get along well with everyone here, except the person I am to spend the rest of my life with. It would be funny were it not so serious. I look upon his parents as my second parents, I see his brother as a dear friend, and I see my intended as a complete ass.

It is good I will not be totally alone, as I had at first feared I would be, for I would have gone stark raving mad. I was worried that, since my parents would not be staying and Inuyasha had left to live with his new mate, that I would be stuck alone with Sesshomaru. After all, his parents would be leaving as well because once we are mated Sesshomaru takes over as ruler of the western lands. Thank the gods for my parents indulgent nature where I am concerned because they had allowed me to bring my dearest friend, and handmaid, Kagura with me.

I don't particularly like this situation but I understand that it could be worse. I could have wound up mated to a man, were I human, several times my age. I could have found myself mated to a demon, like a wolf, that had more than one mate. There are a number of worse situations that I could have found myself in, but I'm not so sure this one is all that much better. Unfortunately, it still could get worse. Lets just say that dog demons, such as I and my intended, are not that well known for their fidelity. I know that I will have no trouble with remaining faithful to my mate, but I wonder about my mate. Infidelity is against my sense of honor, but I'm pretty sure my sense of honor and his are two totally different things. Frankly, I would not stand for something like that, and there is no way to un-mate someone so I will be stuck with him until one of us dies. Dog demons mate for life, it's a very serious commitment. Needless to say, I'm worried. If my mate were to try to take a mistress though he would find himself alone in his castle very quickly. For I would not stay with anyone who could do such a thing.

A bump in the road jostled me out of my thoughts and I turned my attention immediately to the castle looming before me. I had seen it many times before but never had it looked this foreboding. The large gates opened to allow us entrance into the courtyard. I dismounted and waited for my parents to exit the carriage. A stable boy came over to take Oro from me. I flashed him a smile and handed over the reigns. I straightened my dress trying to smooth the wrinkles down. Inutaisho and his mate walked down the stairs from the castle. I smiled brightly and inclined my head in acknowledgment.

A shiver ran down my spine and my instincts warned me that I was being watched. I didn't need my senses to tell me who it was. I looked behind the Lord and Lady of the western lands to see my intended studying me. His gold eyes locked onto mine and I fell into a trance-like state. His face was blank as usual, but there was an odd look in the depths of his eyes.

It took me a few moments to realize that someone was trying to get my attention. I turned my head slightly towards the person talking. I was blushing but I couldn't figure out why. Inutaisho just shook his head at me, he had given up trying to talk to me. Instead he pulled me into a warm hug.

After he released me his mate repeated the action. She pushed me back and held me by my shoulders. She looked me over. She smiled at me proudly. I knew she would not remark on it, but she was amazed at how much I had grown in the four years she had not seen me.

"Welcome back Kagome." She said happily. I relaxed at the sound of her voice. It had the sound of the brook, it was soothing to even the most tense of people.

"It is good to be back." I replied in all honesty. I had missed her. She smiled again. Then she and her mate stepped aside and I felt the nervousness return. Sesshomaru stepped forward. I inclined my head, as did he. It was the formal greeting and that was all I had expected. We stood there for some of the quietest and longest minutes of my life. He had not changed over much from the eighteen year old man I remembered from my last visit. He was amazingly handsome.

"How was your journey?" He asked neutrally, but his amber orbs were still fixed on me. His voice, I hate to admit, was doing things to my body that mere sounds had no right doing.

"It was well enough Lord Sesshomaru." I replied. I fought the urge to chew on my bottom lip. I was nervous. I lost that battle. Not only his gaze but his close proximity was making me unbelievably nervous. Why? I had no idea. He had never had this affect on me before.

Yet another thing that was unfair. His body. It was perfect. Really it was, even though you couldn't see much of it through his clothing. Though I would rather die the most painful death than ever admit that to anyone.

"Well I'm sure you would all like to rest up for a while and such, so why don't I have Kirara show you to your chambers?" Izayo said braking the silence that had descended over the courtyard. I followed everyone else inside the doors of the castle.

Sometime later after I had finished unpacking there was a soft knock on my door. I went to answer it. I knew who it was.

Izayo beamed at me from the hallway and I motioned for her to enter my room. She walked in and looked around her. It was the same room I had always used and it was in the same condition it had been as when I had left over four years ago.

"You know dear, it just hasn't been the same around here without you." She stated while giving me a warm smile. I smiled back and took a seat on the edge of my bed.

"I even think Sesshomaru missed your presence." She added. She looked at me obviously trying to gauge my reaction to her statement. I shook my head in disbelief. She smiled not bothered by my actions.

"We are having your welcoming ball tomorrow dear." She reminded me. I nodded. I don't know why but I couldn't think of anything to say. She sighed heavily.

"It won't be so bad dear you'll see." I immediately knew she wasn't talking about the ball. I winced slightly. The ball wasn't just meant to welcome me back to the house it was too welcome me to the family. Tomorrow night was the last night of my life. Well maybe that's too dramatic but that is what it felt like. As a mother she was biased, she didn't think Sesshomaru was so bad. I though he was the epitome of all evil. Conflicting views.

She patted my shoulder and stood to leave. Before she closed the door she said, "It's not the end of the world." She was right. It wasn't the end of the world. It was just the end of my world.

I bathed quickly and changed into a clean dress. It was a simple gown but I liked it. To be honest I far preferred simple gowns to ornate ones. I looked myself over in the mirror. I looked simple as I always did. My ebony hair fell in soft waves to my waist. It was a shocking contrast to the white and silver dress, but it looked nice. I sighed loudly this was as good as it would get. I moved my bangs out of the way and looked at the symbol of my family in the middle of my forehead. The silver star stood out against my tan skin. I ran my hand over it and sighed. So much would change tomorrow. I let my bangs fall back down. The tips just brushing the single blue stripe on each cheek. I turned quickly on my heel and left my room.

I moved silently along the hallways on my way to the dining room. There was one problem.

I couldn't remember where it was. I quickly found that I was lost in the maze of corridors. I growled in frustration. 'Damn'. I raised my head a little and sniffed the air trying to catch the smell of food in the air. I caught the, all to familiar scent of both sage and pine. I froze, tensing immediately. My breathing became uneven and I resisted the instinct to run. I knew that is what he expected me to do though so I did something unexpected. I turned around.

Smiling sweetly up at him I lifted my head to meet his piercing gaze with one of my own. My own silver eyes clashed with his golden ones. He growled at me. 'What are you doing?' I arched an eyebrow at him in question. He was so touchy even if he was drop-dead gorgeous. I mentally shook myself and glared at him. I growled back at him. 'Why do you care?' He moved so quickly all I saw was a blur and I was pinned up against the wall.

He held me there with his hands, that were on my waist. His body was so close it made my heart beat erratically. He growled at me again. 'Submit.'

So that was what this was about. A shiver traveled along my spine. I, of course, was familiar with the speech of our kind, I even understood what this meant. So I growled back. 'Never.'

He pressed me up against the hard surface with more force. His body was touching my own in far too many places. Damn it. No what had I gotten myself into this time?

" You will submit." He stated. I was stunned. His voice actually held a hint of an emotion. Even if it was anger it was amazing. I recovered quickly from this shock. I knew this game it was the game of dominance. There could only be one alpha between mates. It was obvious he wanted to be the Alpha. I'd be damned though if I would let him dominate me so easily. I smiled innocently and leaned closer to him. I whispered softly, "only in your dreams, Sesshomaru."

That was a surefire way to tick him off. Not just what I had said but what I hadn't said. He had long ago told me to never address him by no other name but 'Lord' Sesshomaru. Oh yeah, he was furious now. He leaned closer to me and I pushed my head back against the wall behind me.

"You forget Kagome, we are to be mated so you will have to submit to me, sooner or later." He replied cooly. I paled at the implication behind such words. He was wrong but to tell him so would be useless. I didn't have to submit to him, if I did things would be easier, but where's the fun in that. I huffed.

"How could I forget something so distasteful as that?" I replied with disdain. He gave me a weird look then he, smirked. Oh no.

"I assure you my dear that our mating will not be dis-taste-ful." he whispered quietly then added. "By the time it is over you will be begging me to do it again." His husky voice made me shudder again. I was nervous now and I began chewing on my lip yet again. Wrong move. The lip I had moments ago drawn attention to found itself, and its companion, pressed roughly against another soft pair of lips. I was shocked for a fraction of a second, but after it wore off I realized the my lips, traitors that they were, were responding to his. Stupid body.

I leaned into him closer. Drawn like a moth to the flame. He growled deeply again. 'Mine.' I didn't notice it, or much of anything else. His lips were hypnotizing. I barely noticed when his tongue invaded my mouth. Somewhere in the back of my mind, the part still capable of coherent thought, I realized that he tasted oddly of honey. It was very odd, he just didn't seem the type to taste like honey, not that I was complaining. Then again, I wasn't doing much of anything. His mouth was far more intoxicating than the strongest of alcohols.

"I was wondering where you two were." A soft voice stated from not to far away. The humor was evident. Sesshomaru growled yet again. 'Damnation.' he stepped away from me. I tried desperately to get my brain to function properly again, but it was slow about its recovery. Sesshomaru walked away like nothing had happened his blank expression back on, but the look he gave me before he turned the corner made me shudder for what seemed like the millionth time that day.

"Come on dear, or your food will get cold." I nodded dumbly and followed her to the dining room.