Kicks and Kisses by Miffy-Chan

Prologue

AN: The Feudal Era doesn't exist here. Everything takes place in the present.

Disclaimer: Nicky and Miffy-chan do NOT own Inuyasha (thank goodness), Kagome, Sesshoumaru sniff or any other characters from the story.

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Chapter One

Prologue

Kagome Higurashi was the average 20-year-old girl, considerably tall with a figure that would have gave Victoria Secret models a run for their money. As a vet, she was financially stable, had a house, dog, and not to mention a grandfather with his head up in space. She had moved out of her mother's apartment a year ago due to her need for privacy, but had adopted a dog as she was used to having Buyo around but the lump of walking fats and fur had stubbornly refused to move its fat weight from the shrine.

"Move it Kira! We've got to get to work before I get my pants fired." Kagome screeched. Due to her profession, she was permitted to bring her dog to work provided that it was toilet-trained.

Kira snarled in reply. It wasn't his fault, after all, she was the one who was having a bad hair day and had spent the past 15 minutes in the toilet attempting to tie the tail of a broom she called hair into a ponytail. Though she had a tendency to be mindful of the state her hair was in, she was seriously lacking in having a sense of beauty-consciousness.

Never in his life had he seen her in revealing clothes. For Kami-sama's sake, she hadn't gone for a single hair or face treatment in her life. Her wardrobe was also about as empty as a certain hanyou's head.

Kagome tugged on Kira's leash and pushed him into the backseat of her car. Kira growled in defiance, but made no attempts to stop her. "Insolent whelp..." Kagome murmured as she gave the giant fur ball a final shove.

'Why in the name of Kami-sama did I have to offend that Tsubaki bitch of all people?' thought Inuyasha darkly. 'Damn the curse... sealing me into this stupid dog form...' Inuyasha sighed inwardly. A reckless driver with no sense of self-conservation as a master is really a dog's wish. Not to say that he had to constantly respond to the ridiculous name 'Kira'.

Inuyasha barked in glee and relief as the car neared the clinic. He was almost certain that she had some form of bribery or had gotten her driving license with her pretty face as she crashed through the streets like a 15-year-old teenager with a hangover whom had taken a driving crash course.

He bounded into the clinic, practically worshipping the solid ground under his feet as Kagome chirped a good morning to Sango, the receptionist.

"Yo Sango! How are you?"

"Hi Kagome-chan! I'm alive and kicking. How's Kira?"

"The usual, he wouldn't get in the damned car."

'And I wouldn't doubt that.' thought Sango.

Kagome entered her personal workspace with Kira just as the front doors burst open again. 'Another paranoid pansy squealing about his pet that lost a strand of hair I suppose...' Sango thought as she picked a stray fur of a guinea pig from her hair. "Morning!" said an indigo-eyed young man, who was carrying a raccoon. "Well, my raccoon just fell ill and-"

He fell silent as he saw Sango.

"My name is Miroku Kazeka." He clasped her hands in his over the receptionist's table and said, "Such exotic beauty... Are you willing to bear my child?"

A slap resounded across the room.

"HENTAI!" screeched the violated person.

Kagome promptly flew out of her room. "What the fish is going on here!" she yelled.

"Kagome!" Sango let out an anguished yell. "This son of a b-"

"Ah, another charming woman, I should thank my lucky stars... Good morning my dear, my name is Miroku Kazeka and I did nothing save asking that beautiful lady over there to bear my child." stated Miroku, with a red handprint across one cheek.

Kagome could have sworn she became clinically dead for a second. She stared blankly at him. "You what?"

"Asked her to bear my child." said Miroku without a tint of red on his cheeks, as he boldly edged over to Kagome. "Now can you take a look at my raccoon, Hachi, please?"

Another slap resounded across the room.

"Remove your hand or I'll do it for you!" Kagome yelled at the man with the accursed hand, who now had symmetrical handprints across both cheeks. "Try that again and you can kiss those precious jewels of yours good bye. Now stop pussyfooting around, get your damn ass into my office and let me see that poor raccoon which by some ungodly misfortune landed up in the hands of a philanderer."

(In the evening...)

"Well, at least today wasn't that screwed up," said Kagome sleepily as she rubbed her eyes. "Especially that Miroku... he isn't too bad when your butt is grope-free. Come on, Kira. Let's go home."

Inuyasha, who had been blissfully dozing in a corner, growled at Kagome as he returned from a trip to la-la land. He reluctantly got up from the floor and stretched himself.

"Beat it, you ball of incarnated fats, before I make you." threatened Kagome, as she packed up her stuff and got ready to leave.

Inuyasha gazed resentfully at Kagome but followed her anyway, giving a soft snort when Kagome bade Sango goodbye affectionately. 'Ningens and the 'thing' they call friendship...'

A long and uneventful (save for Inuyasha being sick out of the window) car ride later, they arrived at the park. Inuyasha woofed questioningly, and Kagome laughed and replied, "Well, it seemed such a nice day, so I thought we should get away for a while. Don't you agree, Kira?"

Inuyasha gave an indignant growl. 'Another day of being dragged around like a rag-doll. She sure loves introducing me to her sick idea of fun...' Why couldn't she find a mate and drag him around instead?'

However, they managed to get through half an hour of 'strolling' without any dispute. 'That's considered a real achievement. Why, I think I even saw a pig fly past. I guess this wasn't such a bad idea after all.' Inuyasha noted. 'I might even enjoy myself.'

Then, as they rounded a bend, Inuyasha caught sight of a man sitting on a bench. He stuck out like a sore thumb. His long silver hair gently cascaded down his back, coming a little over his waist. Slender fingers gently but firmly held a book in front of him, as he narrowed his golden eyes in concentration.

A mischievous glint shone in his eyes. 'Well well, brother... I didn't expect to see you here. I guess this might be interesting after all...' Inuyasha thought, as he gazed from Kagome to Sesshoumaru and smiled evilly.

Tsuzuku

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Miffy-Chan: Yay, so that's the first chappie down! (cheers)

Nicky-Chan: You know, woof sounds really OOC on Inu. (bonks MC on the head with her keyboard)

Miffy-Chan: HEY! What else can I make Inu do, moo?

Nicky-Chan: That might just be a good idea.

Inuyasha: WHAT THE FU-

Miffy-Chan: (snatches NC's keyboard and bonks Inu on the head) No vulgarities there Inu-chan. Anyway, please revi-

Nicky-Chan: OI! I don't want my keyboard with Inu's fleas!

Myouga: I take that as an insult... Demo, ITADAKIMASU! (Jumps to Inuyasha)

Miffy-Chan: WHATEVER. (clears throat) Ahem. ANYWAY. Please review!