Remnants of a Fairytale by MirokuIsMine

Remnants

Authors' Notes: What to say...Hm there is a lot I do need to say. This is by no means the entire story, yet it is only going to be a one chapter story, or so I plan. So lack of better terms this is a preliminary story of sorts. I haven't even fully decided on a title for it. So if I do delete this version and rename it and ext. I will send an e-mail to anyone who reviewed, and left e-mails or are signed. There are probably a gazillion and ten grammatical errors but I plan on re reading this and continuing it and editing it then. Check out my Xanga blog on this story at http://www.xanga.com/MirokuisMine

A lone man stood on the side of a grassy hill, the sun just rising to kiss the sky, as his blank gaze fell on a polished rock, with weeds sprouting up around it. Almost completely taking it over, threatening to smother it.

It seemed like just yesterday, he bemused to himself while running a hand through his long silken hair, but it was so long ago.

It was so strange that out of everything in his life, she was the most vivid memory, no matter how old.

A radiant spark, in a world of dark, his lips twisted into a sad sort of smile, though that flame wavered and almost went out more than once.

He sighed, Once Upon a Time, he mused to himself, there was a lost priestess.

He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply the scent of the forest. It was probably some of the last of it not yet torn down and settled.

What will happen, he looked down at the centuries old stone, what will happen to you when this haven is settled? Will you be paved over, with out remorse? His brow creased in contemplation. What will happen to the memory of you, miko? Kagome the broken priestess.

He opened his eyes as he thought back to his first significant memory he had of the miko.

________________________________________

The ground was damp beneath his feet. He could hear the squish of his shoes pressing down into the sodden earth. The ground soaked with a shower of blood. Some of which was fairly familiar to him.

He scanned the area with his eyes. Hundreds upon hundreds of dead youkai corpses lay about it, their scent already rank from baking in a full days sun. He subconsciously wrinkled his nose up in disgust. Flies buzzed around noisily, landing on all the different corpses, worms probably already feasted on the quickly decaying flesh.

But none of these demons where his concern. They weren't what he was looking for.

He walked through the sea of dead bodies, stopping momentarily to gaze down at the dead body of a demoness, face first into the dirt. She was the first female he had come across while mulling through the corpses.

He felt as if he was becoming a necrophiliac. He wrinkled his nose up at this idea.

He leaned closer to examine her, noting the arrow protruding from her back, reeling back suddenly, not only from the scent of death, but the rancor stench of Naraku. He glared down at the body, kicking it in the side to flip it over.

Empty crimson orbs stared blankly up at him, from a paler than appropriate face.

He contemplated over the smell of the woman, as he watched a roach crawl from her gaping mouth.

He couldn't help but wonder what her connection was to Naraku. He mentally shook himself. This is not why I am here.

He turned from her body and continued walking through the sea of death, stopping every now and then to kick over a body and examine it closer.

"I know I smell it." He said in frustration, "I know I smell Inu Yasha's blood." He felt there was no way his acute nose could be mistaken.

He continued to walk gracefully through the slaughter yard, stepping smoothly over dead bodies, he showed no remorse. He had business to see too. This was business. His eyes took another look over of the area, noticing something off to the side of it, he began pacing towards the before mentioned it, now discerning it as a crater in the earths surface.

He peered into it curiously, bending forward picking up some of the soil and holding it to his nose. The scent was so faint but he was sure...

Inu Yasha.

He dropped the dirt, stood, stepped back, and looked dumbly into the crater. The scent had been so faint and then it just disappeared.

This gets me no where. I still know nothing. He sighed and looked about the area from where he now stood, about to make his leave into the forest, when he saw an appendage poking out from behind a nearby boulder.

This is all such an aggravation. He thought dully to himself as he walked around the boulder to look at the body that lay there.

He surveyed his brother's wench. It took him a good few minutes to recognize her. It had been so long since he had last encountered his brother and his little bevy, and the girl, had changed considerably. He looked at her almost nude form, what he guessed used to be a furisube, hung from her body in shreds. He could not discern its original color. It was too stained with the dark red of her dried blood. Like the demoness of before, an arrow protruded from her chest, but what he found more peculiar, was that in her hands a bow lay, while an empty quiver was just a few feet off.

Surely she didn't shoot herself?

She smelled of salt along with the scent of her blood, and upon closer examination he could plainly see the tear streaks running down her face. He noted her scent wasn't as rank as every other creatures' in the immediate area. She is either alive, or lived longer than the rest.

He kicked her experimentally in the side, before focusing in on her form with his ears. He heard no heartbeat. So she is dead. Pity. She could've told me what happened to the half-breed. He felt no remorse, and there was not a string in his heart pulled, as he turned fully intent on leaving her body there to rot, however there was a pulse at his waste.

Abashed golden eyes looked down at the sword on his hip.

"Tenseaiga?" He questioned cryptically.

It pulsed again, stronger this time. It tugged at his hip towards the girl. He turned, slightly following the swords direction.

"What is the meaning of this? You can't really expect me to resurrect the wench." He looked at it accusingly.

In response the sword only pulsed stronger and faster.

The sound of metal grating metal was heard, as he drew the sword from its' sheath. He looked at the cool, glossy surface of the sword and then to the girl.

"I don't agree with this," His eyes lingered on her body, limbs sprawled out at impossible angles, the arrow protruding ugly from her chest.

But if I resurrect the filth, I can ask of the hanyou, and when I am done I can kill her again.

He nodded his head in his decision; he leaned forward to first pluck the arrow from her chest, before straightening himself, and swiping the long blade across the limp body.

He watched in awe as the gremlins of the underworld disintegrated in front of his eyes.

The only other time he had ever witnessed this, was with Rin. Rin, he sighed mentally. It had been a few months now since he had sent her off to live with a human family residing in a village in his territory. She had grown too old, and he had decided it was best for her to be around mortals, so she could live a normal life...

He found it annoyed him to no end, that he missed the girl.

But that wasn't pertent at the moment. The girl before him was stirring.

"Why?" Her coarse voice flew to his ears in a grating sound.

He stared stolid down at her, as eyes fluttered open to stare at him.

"Why?"

He continued to stare blankly at her.

"Why Sesshomaru?"

He growled, she was starting to aggravate him and she had been alive for only a matter of seconds.

"Why what, wench?" Sesshomaru ground out at her, his eyes slanted into slits.

"Why!"

Well that narrows it down a lot. He mentally rolled his eyes.

"It'd be wise wench for you to calm yourself," He stood straighter and looked down at her with indifference.

She openly guffawed at him, rolling her cerulean eyes as she stood herself up.

He could hear every bone in her body pop and protest.

"That is not wise wench," He crossed his arms over his chest.

"Indeed," She spoke evenly to him.

Well, this was unexpected... He thought stupidly to himself.

He was amazed by the girls' reaction to everything thus far. She had not cried she had not broken down; she hadn't gone to covering herself upon realizing her clothes were just random stitches on her flesh, hadn't lain on the ground and wallowed in self-pity, though in her cerulean orbs he could see the loss.

He stared at her eyes studying them closer. They weren't as open as they had been a few years back. They weren't as innocent. He had the impression they had born witness to too many things to be innocent any longer.

Sesshomaru watched as Kagome limped to the crater.

"Wench what happened to my brother," He raised an eyebrow at her back.

"Gone,"

"You are vague. Elaborate, now." He growled out at her.

She looked at him over her shoulder.

"Or what Sesshomaru? You will send me back to my death?" He grimaced in his mind. That was not the reaction I expected.

He opened his mouth to further threaten her when she cut him off, "He descended into hell," She motioned with her hand to the crater, "with Kikyou." He watched her eyes fall to the ground again as they took on a far off look.

He cursed the idiot Halfling. At least the family blemish is gone.

Then he was struck by something.

No Tetsusaiga?... No tears?

"Does this not bother you?" He truly was curious.

She gave him a sad smile, if you could call it that. "I knew it would happen. I just never expected it to be so soon." She sat down on the grass. "He told me about a month ago that he chose Kikyou," She sighed and looked up at the taiyoukai. "Did you know Sesshomaru that I come from the future?"

He quirked an eyebrow at her she had gone insane under all the stress of the death of his brother.

"Oh don't believe me if you don't want to," She leaned back on her palms looking up at the sky, "But it's true. Five hundred years roughly. Didn't you ever wonder about my odd clothes I used to wear? It's because they are from the future," She said it all so matter of factly that he only slighted believed it.

"Then why don't you wear that garb anymore wench?" He asked motioning to her 'clothes'. He was finding it quite disturbing that she wasn't trying to cover her current state of undress.

Her eyes flashed darkly. "I travel through a well. That very same well was destroyed."

He nodded satisfied with the answer about to ask her something else when she cut him off.

"Inu Yasha destroyed it when he told me he chose Kikyou over me. I suppose he was scared. Scared I would leave in rage and never come back. I have a family on the other side of that well," She stretched her body out a bit more across the grass looking up at Sesshomaru.

"You know I used to think that, too really live you had to give up your life," deep eyes turned up to gaze at him, "but I know now that, that's not true. People live for themselves. Too often with only themselves in mind."

What the Devil is a matter with the woman?

He looked down at her solemnly already slowing flexing his claws to take off her head, with that mouth that refused to stop flapping.

She sat up, timidly placing her palms into the dirt to prop herself up, "We are selfish." Her eyes turned toward the sky.

She was confusing the hell out of him. She had just returned from death and now was speaking to him in such a manner. Where was the depression? Anything! Even the naïve girl she had been would be better expected than this.

"We; me, Inu Yasha, Kikyou, Miroku, Sango, you," her somber eyes drifted up to his, "We. Everyone." Her eyes returned to gazing into the brilliant blue sky. Like she was searching it for some answer.

After a moment she breathed out and pushed herself up, with obvious strain, limping past him as she retrieved her bow, quiver, and then kept walking forward into the thicket of trees.

Sesshomaru raised a quizzical eyebrow at her back. She was so different now, yet still so painfully the same.

"Where are you going wench?" He asked almost amused, as she continued walking not even glancing back to acknowledge him.

"To kill Naraku," She kept her head held high as she continued limping.

There is no doubt now, he thought to himself, she has lost whatever there was of her sanity.

"Do you think this wise in your current state?"

"No," The reply was smooth, breviloquent, and held no fear, it was actually frightening. He watched as she continued limping into the forest, until his ears picked up a light groan before she came collapsing to the earth.

Sesshomaru stared at her heaped up form for a moment, before turning on his heel and began walking away, when a slow pulse started. Immediately accusing eyes were sent to his sword Tenseiga...

He stopped in his tracks, it wasn't his sword. His brows drew together in wrinkles, at his confusion.

If it is not the sword then what? He looked over his shoulder at the girl.

It is the least I could do, he sighed at his lack of luck, seeing as my brother is dead, and there is no care giver present for the girl. He took even steps up to her body before roughly picking her up and tossing her over his shoulder, and departing for the Western Lands.

________________________________________

Who knew I had a conscious? He kneeled down to look evenly at the stone, his nose wrinkling in disgust at all the weeds.

"How is it your chosen weapon, are arrows, yet the was how you fell to death," Sesshomaru watched her as she tried her new crutch for the first time, gently placing her bandaged leg to the hard floor beside her bed she resided in, while inside his castle.

She seemed to be ignoring him, fretting her bottom lip in concentration, "Because Kikyou, my incarnation, shot me down, and as I died she pulled Inu Yasha into Hell with her," She was stoic. The pain she held, the pain that none of the healers could see or mend.

In her last moments of life, she had been forced to watch her first love be drug into Hell, by her clay pot incarnation.

"Oh well, though. What's done is done." She meekly smiled up at him as she gained her balance beside the bed. "Is it not?"

"Indeed, it would seem," Though he highly doubted she felt what she said.

He stood back up shaking his head.That is not acceptable. He began pulling at the aggravating weeds as he thought back at the girl.

________________________________________

"You know Sesshomaru," She stared out at the horizon, from her comfortable sitting position on the grassy hill, beneath a red Japanese maple, "I used to love fairytales when I was younger."

Sesshomaru looked at her from the corner of his eyes. Her body reclining back on her elbows, her broken leg sticking out from her furisube wrapped in many cloths, and two firm pieces of wood on either side. For the life of him, he couldn't understand why he let her stay; when she had collapsed back in the forest he had had every intention of leaving her for worm food. Her conversation, he decided after a moment's deliberation. She said some of the most remarkable things. Au courant, brilliant things that someone her age shouldn't have lived through yet.

Or maybe you pity her existence. There is nothing left for her. He came to the conclusion that that was a very plausible reason.

"All those Once upon a time's, it was all so magical and romantic," She rotated her good ankle around as she watched the sunset, "but it's much different when you live it," she looked down at her hand at her side, "and when the ending is never really known."

Only a few weeks, he thought to himself, I've really known her, but a few weeks, and yet I know her so well you'd think it'd been years. He recalled how when he'd brought an unconscious human woman, barely dressed, into his palace gates, how the gossip had flown, and then thrice when discovered she was also a miko.

"All fairytales are supposed to have a happy ending," She smiled up at him. A smile put to shame by what it used to be. "That's the magic and beauty of them, right?"

"I suppose," He spoke quietly to her.

"Do you think this one will?" She sounded like she knew the answer as is.

"Quite possibly, I suppose." Sesshomaru turned his head too look down into her face.

"Hm," Was all she said as she looked yet again out at the horizon.

"Why is it, miko, that you still mourn your loses?" He questioned stolidly. "But you do not weep?"

Kagome smiled a small sad smile at him, "How can I cry when there are no tears left?" She sighed, "What is the point of crying, when you know no matter how many tears you shed that can't bring them back to you?"

"Them? You mean the rest of your bevy, too?" She had only told him little things about the whereabouts of the rest of the group never enough to really piece together into a story. "And why pretend to smile, when you have no joy left?"

In a moment even the fake smile fell.

"Because tears would be for me, and my smile is for those whom surround me. I don't want pity, the best way to avoid that is for people to believe I am happy." Her eyes were level with his, deep with what she had learned over years, deep with sorrows unknown to most, deep with passion felt, deep with hopes and dreams so harshly crushed. Deep with afflictions unspoken.

His amber orbs stared blankly down at her, as he realized all of this. All of what she was. All of what was unknown to him. Pain. Life. Love.

"Once upon a time there was a life loving monk," She started calmly taking a deep breathe, always a sign to him that she was about to recall something, as she turned her face to the sky, "He was cursed with a wind tunnel in his right hand. A curse passed on from his Grandfather, due to the malice of Naraku. Too the world he was known as the lecherous monk, with amazing spiritual power, and the amazing blessing of a life absorbing hole in his hand. Too his friends, he was known as the monk madly in love with a demon slayer, though he never really admitted it, whom would lie about some evil spirit to get us a good place to sleep, who loved to laugh even though he was constantly troubled, and who carried the burden of the life taking hole in his hand, one that would eventually take his own.

" And this is of course his tragic flaw, how we come to the ending of the story known as Miroku; One day while I was gone off to the future, the group had just returned to the village on a bogus shard rumor. It was an average evening for the rag-tag group, full of bickering, perverted antics, and punches. When suddenly Miroku stood," She recalled the events as Sango had told her through bursts of sobs the next night. "Kagome! I never said it back! I never said..." She refocused her mind to the story she was telling, "And left the camp in a hurry. The demon slayer jumped up to follow her secret love in worry, worry that he was off to propose to some other woman, when she happened upon him in a clearing kneeled, holding his accursed hand, and chanting.

'Houshi-sama?'

'Leave Sango, now!'

'But wh-' She made a move towards him.

'Damn it Sango I said leave!' He turned too look at her blurry eyed over his shoulder.

She gasped as realization hit her, 'No Miroku I can't!'

'You have to! Now damn it!' He screamed at her in aguish as the wind in the area started to pick up. 'Sango, now...' His tears began to fall harder as he begged his only love to leave and let him die.

'Miroku,' She took involuntary steps back in her shock of the raw emotion in his voice.

'Promise me,' He bit his lip in a sudden spout of pain as the rip became larger in his hand. 'Promise me as my last wish, that you will not allow yourself to be sucked in.'

She nodded at him tears pouring down her face as she began to turn away, she could not bare the sight of her love being drug into his palm.

'And Sango,' She turned back to him the shock apparent on her face at being called back. 'I love you,' He smiled at her brilliantly throughout all the pain. Those were the last words ever heard from the monk known as Miroku, as he was sucked into his cursed palm the very next moment."

Kagome let out a breath at the obvious effort she had put into declaiming her tale.

"No happy ending?" Sesshomaru spoke smoothly.

"In a way, yes there was," the answer shocked Sesshomaru as his head whirled for him to look at the girl who was now forcing herself up into a standing position. "For the first time in his life he let the world know how the real Miroku was, how he felt, and what better way for one to die then as their true selves, and in love?"

"What of the others?" He asked as he eyed her warily as she stood above him, balancing on her one good leg while stretching.

She took up her wooden staff, which served as a crutch. "Another day for those Fairytales, Sesshomaru." She began hobbling off smiling that sad smile back at him, "Well are you coming lazy?"

"You are a peculiar wench," He said to himself as he stood easily walking beside her.

________________________________________

He smiled proud of himself, down at the weed free polished rock. It's the least I can do, after everything that you gave.

He sighed sitting down in front of it, legs crossed, his head resting in his palm. I wish you were here to tell me one of your fairytales. One of your deep insights.

'Why is it woman, that even though you carry such a large burden, that you do not allow your shoulders to droop with the weight?'

'Because Sesshomaru,' her face upturned to his, 'if that burden wasn't there I wouldn't be who I am today,' she hobbled up in front of him, just a day off of her crutch and already pushing the leg, 'plus there is always someone who has it worse than I do,' she was a few good feet in front of him, as she cast a solemn smile, 'besides if not for all of that, you, Demon Lord of The Moonlit Lands, and I, Kagome Higurashi, of the Future, wouldn't be taking a walk through the forest.'

He waited until her back was fully too him before he let the tiniest of grins grace his face.

"You were some human," Most humans would've cried in self-pity, but you took the little good that came from it. He titled his head in his palm, as he thought back on the first instant that he had ever really smiled, besides his childhood. My turning point. He rolled his eyes at himself. Actually, I suppose my turning point was the moment I met the woman. It was so odd, as he sat there and thought back on it. He had never felt different then, never felt the slow change taking place, but maybe that was her own magic. Her magic to change things, and make them sorrowfully beautiful, with words or with her soul.

________________________________________

He walked down the winding corridors of his palace, out into the dimming sunlight. He seemed to glide past one side of the white stone walls, passing his guards on the way.

Where is the insufferable woman?

He heard light humming coming from deep inside the stalks of flowers. His ears pricked slightly as he followed the delicate and very feminine sound.

She was leaned over a large red hibiscus inspecting the petals carefully, dressed in a deep blue furisube, the long and elegant sleeves brushing the ground. Designs of cranes danced across the hems of the garment, as a lighter blue obi was tied about her waist.

Her eyes were glazed over, so it seemed she was recalling things in her mind, rather than actually scrutinizing the vibrant bloom.

He just stood there and watched her. He almost felt guilty at beholding the sight. Like watching something to Holy and perfect for his eyes, even though he knew that she was far from perfection.

Not completely true , he thought to himself. She held her own perfection, and it was stunning. Something he couldn't grasp, it would always slip between his claws.

For one of the first times, since childhood, he felt inadequate. There was no way this creature before him was meant for Earth, and the afflictions that came with being of the world. Yet, ironically, it was those very afflictions that had molded her into being so ethereal.

He would have been content to just observe her for the rest of the day, but she straightened out her back and tossed him a glance over her shoulder.

"Good afternoon Sesshomaru," She smiled her broken smile.

"Evening would be more appropriate," The sun would set in just a few hours.

"Is it?" She looked up at the sky, her eyes wide like she had never seen it before. "I guess I lost track of time in my musings," She sighed as she began walking up to him, "Want to go for a walk?"

"That sounds enjoyable," Kagome reached out, the long sleeve falling back to expose a delicate white wrist, which was connected to the hand that now held his limp one.

Sesshomaru found it rather peculiar that he was neither shocked, nor bothered by her actions. He walked a few steps behind her as she led him to the exact spot he had expected her too, the little hill with the lone Japanese Maple, that overlooked the forest and horizon, where the sun set.

Such an odd wench, he thought as he sped his step up, so he was walking even with her. His eyes fell on her as she continued to stare forward. Very odd, indeed.

________________________________________

"How time flies when you dwell on the past," He drummed his fingers on the ground. No matter how much of the world he had seen, this spot was still the most beautiful. So many memories are tied to this spot.

________________________________________

She was reclining beside him, staring out at the pink and orange hues of twilight. He had decided it was her favorite time of day.

"Sesshomaru?"

"Hm?"

"When will I be allowed to go after Naraku, again?" She looked up at him from the corners of her eyes.

"We will go when you're inferior human body is healed completely." He saw her eyebrow rise.

"We, Sesshomaru?"

"Hm" You won't be alone again Kagome.

She looked up at the sky, looking more content than he had seen her since, well ever.

"Once Upon a Time," her voice floated to his ears on the breathy whisper of the wind, "there was a lonely demon slayer," her face took the look it always had when she recalled tales, or insights. Her eyes glazed, her lips parted, her voice became more like a harmony to a lovers ballad. "Who lost everyone she ever loved. From her entire family, to the one man she ever cared for. She had loved a perverted monk, who often grouped woman sporadically, though it was well known he only loved her. She was there as he died, watched as she could do nothing to save the love of her life, as he fell victim to his hand. She heard his last words. Words that she had dreamt of hearing come from his lips to her, I love you.

"The girl truly lived in her own world of depression and inner demons. She tried to hide the hurt, but when she thought no one was watching, she would gaze off into space solemnly, and the silent tears would fall, or her hands would go to her back, and lightly trace the scar that of her own blood had given her." Kagome took a deep breathe, not to steady her emotions like she would have in the past, but too think of the next part of the Fairytale.

Sesshomaru was quickly finding new respect for the human race, in this one girl and the stories of her companions.

"Thus brings us to the end of the tale known as Sango; There came a day when we battled Naraku's hordes of demons. Everyone too preoccupied with their own battles to realize the brother and sister demons slayers disappear into the thick forest in a battle together. When we did arrive at the scene in the forest this is what had laid before our eyes;

'Free me sister,' Kohaku was obviously straining to stay in control of his own self. Keeping the monster of his possessed self at bay. His fading orbs stared up at his sister, who pinned him with her body and knees, and held a sword poised above his chest.

'Forgive me Kohaku,' Tears fell freely from those warm chocolate eyes as she thrust the sword deep into her own brothers' heart, before pulling it back out in a jerky motion. All watching could do nothing more than stand staring in awe.

She stood slowly. Her face was cast to the horizon and the high sun until she turned to face us.

'Forgive me everyone,' The words came out so rushed as she raised the sword to her chest.

'Forgive me God,' She was so quick with her thrust, not even the superior speed of Inu Yasha could beat the sword. She fell to her knees, those tear filled brown eyes staring straight out at me.

'He wasn't meant for this world' Blood trickled from her lips as she let out the mere whisper, before her face fell into the dirt."

Kagome sighed. "I stayed up all that night trying to save her. Trying to save her and crying." She put her head in her hands. "I used to think she could still be alive if I had just done something, instead of stand there like a fool in shock." The old reminisces of pain in her eyes, but still no tears.

"Though if I had, I would have ruined her ending."

"Her ending?" He questioned lightly.

"Though she acted so tough, she and her brother a like, were not meant for the life they lived. She just wanted to be free. She wasn't meant for the manacles of pain." Kagome's eyes fell to the cool grass, as her fingers separated the blades.

"Kagome," His voice trailed off. He hadn't a clue as to what to say.

Cerulean orbs, that held a spark so dim, stared up into his soul.

So much, his mind was chaos, so much I need to say. I want to say. But I don't know how. What would be the repercussions. It was overpowering in his chest, that he, Sesshomaru, was afraid. Afraid that it would stop his very breath. It was so serene and quiet here on this hill, but it was pure cacophony in his ears.

"Find your own freedom," he stood quickly and briskly took off in the direction of his castle.

These feelings were unwanted. This compassion that seared through his chest was not welcomed.

________________________________________

He stood from where he had sat, circling the stone, and picking at the sporadically growing flowers.

________________________________________

Sesshomaru was frantic, the woman was no where to be found within his castle gates.

I specifically told her not to step off of the grounds without my accompaniment. He was seething but something baffled him; how could one silly, human miko get passed his guards? He highly doubted they would go against his orders and just allow her to saunter through the gates.

The demon lord was trying frantically to follow her light scent of lotus blossoms, and something else, something that was her own essence, but it was proving difficult now that her scent was laced throughout his entire castle. It was almost like she was part of it now. Meshed in with everything else of it.

His nose was trying to decipher what path to take, by where her scent was strongest, and most recent.

It all smelled so faint. She must've been missing for some time now. How could her absent presence go unnoticed for so long? Sesshomaru walked past stalks of young bamboo, when he came to one section of the castle wall that had thick passion flower vines growing up its side.

Something was amiss.

He approached the wall in attempts to figure out what exactly it was. The vines were clear signs that some had used them as a make shift ladder. Clever girl, he thought as he jumped over the high wall.

His feet landed softly upon the Earth floor of the opposite side of his castle gate. He instantly began walking down the path that would undoubtedly lead to her. So it was not surprising to him in the least, when he crested the small hill, that she sat there, one blue kimono clad knee drawn to her chin.

"Why did you follow me?" Kagome was so beautifully nostalgic sitting there underneath the Japanese maple staring off into the horizon.

Why did I follow her? It posed a good question, though he decided dwelling on it would bring him no benefit.

"Why did you leave?" He countered instead.

"Why do people usually leave Sesshomaru?" Her eyes never wavered, never flicked over to him, this irked Sesshomaru to no end and he felt the undying need to bring those eyes to him.

"I assume different people have different reasons," he spoke after a moments pause.

"No," her voice was crisp and bitter like she had been crying, though this possibility he found highly unlikely. "People always leave for the same basic reason; to get away, or at least pretend like leaving will end the pain and bring forth the soothing relief of forgiveness." She drew her bow shaped lips into a line.

"Kagome," She closed her eyes. "Kagome," Still they did not open. Something pinched in Sesshomarus' chest. Something unknown and unwanted, but still present. He had the urge to touch her. He had to touch her. Feel the warm skin and be sure the blood still was flowing beneath it.

I must.

His clawed hand reached out to her and in a blink of an eye he was on his knees firmly bringing her to his chest while shaking her with his body.

He couldn't control himself any longer, now that he had touched her skin, he had been set off. "Kagome!" The call was so strange, so foreign, so emotional.

Damn Karma to Hell

He felt something warm slide down his neck. He pulled back suddenly, looking into her deadpan eyes, that shined with very alive tears.

"Kagome?" He began very unsure of everything. A feeling ran through his body from his chest to his brain, which he now clearly understood to be confusion. Unease and hot liquid emotion settled into the pit of his stomach. "What is wrong?"

"I am tired," she raised empty orbs to him, "I am tired, and I am only nineteen." She was surprised she even recalled her age. There had been no need for birthdays in the Feudal Era. Oh no, no, only thing needed in the Feudal Era seemed to be heartache and jewel shards.

Sesshomaru found it hard to swallow and pressed her up against his body,

"Once Upon a Time, there was an orphaned kitsune," he felt her eyelashes brush his collarbone, signaling the closing of her eyes, "He was a lively little prankster with a spark for life, despite his losses. Though he was young, he wanted retribution for his parents' unjust murder. Fighting was not the life intended for such a soul," Sesshomarus' hand instinctively clutched the enormous soul living in this petite girls body at those particular words. "Thus brings us to the end of this tale: it was an ugly wet dark day. A terrible omen, especially after our past misfortunes. We paid no heed. We were depressed and miserable, just the three of us, the way it began. We would not stop, too driven by our craving for revenge. It burned from the pits of our stomachs to our swollen bloodshot eyes. He tried so hard to courageous, tried so hard to be what he thought I wanted him to be, when I just wanted him to be the child he was meant to be.

"I had fallen from a particularly nasty tentacle that Naraku had shot out at me, while another stopped a few feet from me, pausing menacingly above my heart. Just as it shot out to finish me, Shippou jumped out in front of it, facing me. Tears filled his eyes as I watched the tentacle shoot through his young, innocent chest, his last words will burn in me forever: 'I let one of my mothers die. I won't let another.' " She was shaking so hard he was scared she'd shake her very soul out of her body. "So was the end of the little kitsune known as Shippou"

Sesshomaru looked out at his distant castle, while he held this fragile human priestess in his arms. This beautifully fragile priestess in his arms.

Too much flowed through his body. Too many thoughts. Too much. Conviction. Damnation. Too much. Fate.

Then he felt hot tears roll down his neck and felt the uncharacteristic urge to sigh when a thought dawned on him, that was absolutely acting remarkably uncharacteristically. He fully blamed the being that he held tightly in his arms.

He searched for resentment, called for it, wanted it, but it could not be found. He couldn't resent this woman, it was impossible for him.

Weren't these feelings the reason I removed Rin from my presence?

It would almost secure his fate to be forced to feel these emotions, though he quickly pushed the notion aside for fear if it was dwelled upon for too long it would become fact.

"I'm sorry," She breathed out, her voice light as a feather and as cracked as the Shikon no Tama. His eyes snapped to her, and stared into dark tresses. Before he could ask she elaborated. "I'm sorry for feeling. I thought I was beyond this weakness by now. Thought I'd never shed another pathetic tear." She pushed off of him abruptly and walked past him to the castle never turning back, as he kneeled there as she had left him, his arm dangling limply.

Is this Earth or is it Hell?

_______________________

The man lay back onto the cool grass his deep eyes staring up into the afternoon sky. He had the urge to cry thinking about the particular memory. I don't know what I hated more, seeing her pretend she didn't want to cry or seeing the tears fall.

___________________

"Sesshomaru," She stood in the entrance to his bed chambers. A rich green furisube on, her hand placed on the frame of the massive wooden doors.

"Kagome," he didn't look up from the papers he was reading. He was reclining in his elegant four poster bed, white silk sheets pooling at his hips and covering his long legs. He had not felt like rising and preparing for the day, instead he had chosen to lie in bed and read over paperwork from other Lords and Ladies.

She walked boldly into the room, going straight to his bed and climbing on top of it. "Sesshomaru where are w-"

She was cut off by a disgruntled Jaken running into the room.

The toads jaw dropped at the sight that met his bulging eyes. "Lord Sesshomaru my deepest apologies! I told the wench," his eyes cut evily to Kagome who was staring almost bored back at him, "that you were far to busy for her silly qualms but when I turned to leave she beat me over the head with her old crutch, she keeps by her bed-"

"Enough Jaken," Sesshomaru was trying to suppress laughter at the mental images he was currently getting.

"M'lord?"

"You are excused Jaken, the miko remains," with that Sesshomaru turned his eyes back to his papers.

Jaken cast a suspicious look at Kagome before exiting and closing (with difficulty) the heavy wooden double doors.

"Sesshomaru?" Kagome was staring up at him intently, he could feel it.

"Hm?" he continued to read over his papers.

"Jaken said that I was to go with you on your business today?" Those eyes remained on him.

"Hm," he replied once again. He knew why she was even bothering to question him on the matter, he never took her with him when he left the castle for business, no matter what it was.

Kagome continued to stare up at him, studying. He looked up at her with his blank gold eyes, staring back at her.

"Well I guess I should go prepare to travel," she smiled sadly at him as she slid off the bed and continued to walk out of the room.

He turned his attention back to his papers, though his thoughts weren't really on them, just as they hadn't been all morning.

What would you think of me Kagome if you knew that I was scared what you would do if I left you, even for one day?

He sighed standing from his bed and walking to his armoire.

__________________

Really what was I so scared about? That you'd kill yourself? He laughed sadistically at the thought. I knew better than that, you wanted retribution far too badly. He sighed and smiled sadly. No I was scared of losing any precious time with you.

_________________

Kagome sat in the middle of the huge bed Sesshomaru had provided for her. She clutched her white silky sheets to her chest.

She was fighting off the demons that tortured her sleep. Her eyes drifted to the canopy that hung over her beautiful bed. It was almost like she could see their faces there.

"You are haunting me," she said quietly to the room. Her dull eyes looked all around, searching for solace. "I'm sorry," she put her head on her drawn up knees.

Sesshomaru sipped lightly on his green tea awaiting Kagome for their lunch. He couldn't ease the unease of her not being there at that exact moment. Where is she anyway? She really should've been here from her bath already.

As if she knew he was thinking about her the guards pushed open the doors to the massive dining room. She was silhouetted there, in her simple yukata she had taken to wearing now that the weather was far too hot for the heavy fabrics of furisubes. With the light the garment was vapid, he could see every curve on her body screaming femininity. She took a few light steps into the room as the guards shut the heavy doors open. She looked out the numerous windows of the dining room before looking up at him.

"Where have you been?" He realized he said it a bit too tensely.

Of course her being an astute individual caught the terseness of it. "Why are you so concerned?"

He didn't like the way this interaction felt, they'd never really done this before but once he started he couldn't quite.

"You give yourself far too much credit. I am not concerned about you." He took a sip of his tea to try to cover the guilt that he felt at the words.

"Is that what you told Rin?" Kagome was standing across the table from him now, her eyes downcast on her own tea she now held in her hands. She was so casual and Gods did it infuriate him.

"Watch your place miko." He knew he really ought to loosen his grip on his tea cup it was threatening to crack.

"Haven't we been over this before," her eyes cut maliciously up to his, and he couldn't control the feeling that it really was a look he never again wanted directed at him, "What are you going to do? Kill me again?" She placed a hand on the top of the table as to lean closer to stare him in the eyes. "Do you miss her that much? Is that why you put up with me? Is it your pity for me that allows you to sleep at night."

He knew exactly who the 'her' she was referring was and that made it all the more aggravating.

Rin.

As he opened his mouth to make a sarcastic retort back to her she cut him off with a softer tone, but it still held so much underlying viciousness, it was alarming, "If you regret, Sesshomaru, you will lose your own life," she straightened back up, tea cup poised delicately on one palm, while the other hands slender fingers curled around it. She brought it up and sipped from it, her cerulean orbs viewing him from just above the rim.

"Do as you preach priestess," he felt the words leave an ugly red welt on her heart as the cup crashed to the floor. He could hear the tearing of her heart as she turned sharply on her heel and, with obvious strain, walked quickly from the room without bursting out into a full fledge run.

Mere seconds after those heavy doors were shut you could hear the most impressive racket of crashing dishes and splintering wood ever.

__________________

"I have to say," He was laying on his back staring up at the sky, a butterfly glided across his vision, "That was the most terrifying thing ever." He smirked lightly as he continued to watch the butterfly.

____________________

He was nervous and damn it he had every right to be. She had been in her room for two weeks now, only coming out to go to the bath chambers, she was even taking meals in her room. If she was even eating, she looked alarmingly thin lately.

Sesshomaru had a very suspicious sinking feeling that he was feeling guilty. Of course he was too proud to admit it.

Still the woman was scaring him out of his mind and that was something he was willing to confess.

So he found himself sitting outside her door at, God only knows what time. It must have been so late, or was it early? He felt like he ought to be close to her, he'd been stationed here for an hour or so now.

His head lifted slightly, he heard a sharp in take of breathe from inside the room.

"Stop," her whisper was so light which was followed by equally light sobs.

Sesshomaru's clawed hand came up to rest on the door, as he lightly pushed it open and stepped inside the dark room.

It was so morbid in the room. It was dark, not only from night but the obvious mood of it's inhabitant dampened it. It was quite obvious she hadn't allowed servants to clean it as furisubes and yukatas were strewn everywhere, along with random papers. He looked at the grand four poster bed, where a minute figure curled in a fetal position laid, back to him.

Kagome's body was racking with sobs that she was obviously trying to repress.

She didn't seem to realize he was in the room as he slowly walked towards her bed.

Step, Step, Step... It was a mantra he was repeating in his head. The only consciously clear thought he possessed.

Why do things always have to be so complicated with her? He felt his brow crease at the very true epiphany.

This made him stop. Why was he tormenting himself?

His eyes stayed upon her form as she tossed restlessly until her body rested facing him. Kagome's cerulean eyes were wide open and focused on him.

That look was so intense. It burnt. He wanted to destroy her eyes, pluck them out. They were so perfect and that hurt him so fucking much.

"Feelings mean nothing," her voice was light but held such a strength his eyes shifted from those damn searing eyes to the chapped pink lips.

Still his eyes of their own accord went back up to her searing orbs. Those eyes were saying so much to him.

"I am feeling so lonely," something new flashed in her eyes. It was then that Sesshomaru knew all she needed in that moment was for him to help her. To make the moisture dry from those ethereal eyes. They cried and ached for him to just touch her and make it better.

His body was disintegrating, he could feel it. It was that unabashed need, loneliness shining through her pupils, she didn't need to tell him. He could see it there and damn it all to hell it hurt.

I feel so damned. I can't decide if she is the damnation or the retribution. His eyes continued to lock with hers.

Yet again the thought occurred to him. Why do I torment myself with her?

He turned crisply on his heel. Those next six steps were achingly slow. They sent jolts of pain up his legs to his chest. Still he never looked back as he closed the door on her. As he left her in darkness.

__________________

"I guess it was a psychological thing for me," he was talking again to the polished rock, "I had only learned abandonment from my parents," he smiled letting his canines protrude slightly, "it's what came naturally to me."

________________

Sesshomaru felt like a fool. A damn right fool.

He looked up at the bright sky, resisting the urge to squint. It was barely afternoon and he was already riding Ah-Un back to the castle. He felt like a damn fool because he had specifically said he would be gone for at least a couple of days, and here he was a few hours after leaving and he was turning around and heading back to the castle.

That damn woman. He wanted to pull his own hair out he was so frustrated.

Instead he sat crossed legged on the back of his massive two headed pet youkai. He leaned his head into the palm of his hand, while his tapped his claws of his other hand upon the rough green scales of the demon.

I wonder if insanity suits me, he smirked idly, because I am without a doubt losing sanity quickly.

I don't see why I'm really even going back, he thought in exasperation, I'll go back to find what? Her still locked in her room.

The whole reason he had truly even left to do business with the Lady of the Northern Land was to just get out of that castle. She was laced into it. Her aura had infected it like a horrible disease that he was unable to escape.

Him leaving was proof that she didn't affect him.

He heard a little voice in the back of his head laugh at him and he growled aloud in response.

I don't care about her. I walked out on her. He nodded his head at this. It was true he left her to bathe in her own misery.

This thought wasn't as comforting as he had hoped.

That was it.

Sesshomaru stood upon Ah-Un. "Stop, we are turning back." I'll be damned if I turn around because of that bitch. He crossed his arms firmly over his chest as Ah-Un began turning and trotting forward.

As he let his eyes cut back one last time in the direction that he knew his castle to lay, he saw something peculiar.

"Stop again Ah-Un," The beast obediently stopped mid step as Sesshomaru jumped from its back into a slightly taller tree.

He was sure of it now.

There was a strange black mass laying above the area his castle was located.

It was ominous and foreboding and he just didn't like it at all. After all it was his castle.

"Ah-Un return to the castle, I am going back on my own," not a second after that he had jumped to the ground and was traveling as fast as his demon blood could take him.

After all it was his castle.

Sesshomaru felt like his legs weren't taking him fast enough, a feeling he had never experienced. And it wasn't doing much to keep him calm.

After all it was his castle at risk here.

If he felt anything after that point on his run to the castle he couldn't tell, his entire being was focused on one goal and that was reaching that castle as fast as he could.

Damn it, it was his castle and he had to protect it.

He was searing when he finally cleared the forest and his castle lay in front of him.

However it wasn't exactly what he had expected to find.

It was Naraku's demon bugs that swarmed, just as he had expected, yet they were not actually over his castle, but off to the East a bit.

He felt his heart clench.

Because he knew exactly which village it was they were swarming over.

Again the searing returned to his body as he took off to the village in question. He was almost through the forest when he sensed Kagomes' presence, and sure enough there she was. Running as fast as her previously broken leg would allow her, her bow and quiver of arrows slung over her back.

He didn't have time to stop for the woman as he ran straight past her.

"Sesshomaru!" Her voice drifted to him on the wind as he reached the village.

What lay before his eyes would haunt him. Forever.

Naraku stood there, transformed tentacles out and clasping a squirming figure.

"Ah Lord Sesshomaru," the cold cackle that served as Naraku's voice grated Sesshomaru's ears, "So nice of you to join us." He nodded his head to the squirming and screaming person in his clutches.

Fucking bastard. Damn him to fucking hell.

His heart was so tight as he watched the silly little human girl who had once tried to save him. The very one who plagued him with emotion and started this whirlwind of feeling that had escalated to this damn compassion.

"I take it you are acquantied to my new little friend here," he turned and menacingly smiled at the flaying girl.

"Lord Sesshomaru!" Fire burned in her eyes as she turned to Naraku, "He is going to kill you! No one can face the might Lor-"

There was a distinct snapping sound in the general vicinity.

It could be argued that it was the innocent girls neck, or the demon Lord's sanity.

His veins burnt livid with raw animosity unmatched by anything tangible and intangible in the world.

Kill. Blood. Fucking murder. Damn. Half-blooded bastard.

Sesshomaru's mind was just snippets of angry thoughts, he was unaware as the priestess stepped into the clearing and knocked and arrow and fired it at the abomination that was Naraku.

Pink light exploded. Brilliant pink light, enveloping the tentacles, searing the flesh off of them, the poison bugs evaporated into nothing more than dust, all that remained of the half blood demon was the spool that allowed the true Naraku to control his puppet.

Sesshomaru sent accusing eyes to the girl.

He had wanted so badly to sink his claws into flesh and just rip. Tear. Kill.

His eyes flashed to the heaped up little girl on the ground.

His brisk steps echoed loudly across the dirt. Sad eyes following his heels.

Metal grating was heard as he raised Tensaiga up and swiped it across the innocent body.

Nothing.

Fucking nothing.

Damned fucking nothing.

Sesshomaru didn't sense it happening as he transformed into his giant dog form and let out a pained howl and curled his body around the small girl that was once Rin.

Kagome took small hesitant steps forward, crouching, easing closer to the protective dog, who was really a broken demon lord.

As soon as she was within five feet the dog raised his head and growled threateningly at her, but she paid it no attention as she outstretched her fingers to graze the light soft fur and as soon as her hand made contact with the skin the giant beast began to shiver.

She wrapped her tiny arms around the impressively large animals leg, her face burning buried into the thick fur.

"Life is unfortunate. We are such a cosmic joke." His ears could pick up her muffled voice coming from his fur.

Just as he had not realized his transformation he did not realize his return to his more humanoid state, and the young woman whose arms were now wrapped around his waist and the little girl held in his arms.

This is what life was.

Cruel.