Behind These Hazel Eyes by rose_draquia

Chapter One

Behind These Hazel Eyes

Seems like just yesterday

You were a part of me

I used to stand so tall

I used to be so strong

Kagome watched once again as Inuyasha swept his eyes across the clearing, trying to hide that he had noticed the soul stealers and was waiting until an escape could be made. She felt the tears well once again within her but she was far too used to this situation, it felt like she was breaking inside, she remembered when she used to stand tall, but each of these blows Inuyasha rained on her soul, it was hurting her more than any physical wounds. She remembered what it was like before when he would show her the odd bit of compassion, a tiny bit of love...

Your arms around me tight

Everything, it felt so right

Unbreakable, like nothin' could go wrong

Now I can't breathe

No, I can't sleep

I'm barely hanging on

He had finally found his excuse. Fire wood. Apparently we needed fire wood for the large and cheerily blazing fire in the center of the clearing, what did he think she was? An idiot? He ambled out of the clearing but the second he was out of sight she sensed him breaking into a run, heading for the undead presence she felt nearby. The tears filled her soul, but the dam she had built in her eyes refused to break, not for anyone. Her heart was just a plaything to him, the one she had loved, probably still did love him. Self-contempt welled within her. She still couldn't bring herself to hate him, no matter the size of the lake within her, her very own lake of tears...

Here I am, once again

I'm torn into pieces

Can't deny it, can't pretend

Just thought you were the one

Broken up, deep inside

But you won't get to see the tears I cry

Behind these hazel eyes

Standing she said she needed a walk to her understanding friends. Who was she kidding? They knew. They knew about her pain, she was just as bad as Inuyasha, may as well tell the truth, but she couldn't do it. Speaking about it out loud would only break her dam, and she couldn't handle that, not yet. Making her way through the forest surrounding their little clearing she let her emotions wash through her, using anger and bitterness to reinforce the wall within her, but only to keep the tears at bay, she would never become like Kikyo anymore than she was already. She would not be a shell of her former self, only feeling hatred and betrayal.

She remembered how it used to be with Inuyasha, where she would spill her heart out to him about everything but her growing love of the foolish hanyou. Feeling her tears swirl behind the barrier in her eyes, she wouldn't let them go; she was never again going to give that hanyou anything, not even her tears, and definitely not her love.

I told you everything

Opened up and let you in

You made me feel alright

For once in my life

Now all that's left of me

Is what I pretend to be

So together, but so broken up inside

'Cause I can't breathe

No, I can't sleep

I'm barely hangin' on

Walking into another larger clearing centered around a large oak tree she examined it, feeling for any demons. Only a place as beautiful as this would house a demon waiting to kill her. But to her surprise she was alone. Examining her surroundings for some reason she couldn't seem to see it, it was like she was looking through warped glass and the beauty that surely surrounded her couldn't reach her through it.

Moving across the moonlit bathed grass she went to the oak, letting her hand rest upon its trunk and feeling her spirits calm as the wise tree surrounded her with its aura. All miko were beings of nature, and so it was to nature she turned when her soul was torn apart again.

Here I am, once again

I'm torn into pieces

Can't deny it, can't pretend

Just thought you were the one

Broken up, deep inside

But you won't get to see the tears I cry

Behind these hazel eyes

It was too late that she noticed the familiar presence. Spinning round she watched as the moonlight seemed to surround him as he stood a few paces from her, his amber eyes watching her. The light seemed to move on its own, surrounding him in a white aura that was the complete opposite of his red youkai.

'Sesshoumaru.' She said, bowing slightly. It seemed he was not here to kill her or her friends this time. His resemblance to her old love sent pains through her heart, tearing her apart once more; trying to destroy the dam she had worked so hard to create, her barrier so like his mask. His eyes seemed softer and she, for the first time in a long time, felt guilt at her part in his damage, she had hated him, she had feared him, and through it all, she could only blame herself.

Swallow me then spit me out

For hating you, I blame myself

Seeing you it kills me now

No, I don't cry on the outside

Anymore...

'Miko.' He said lightly, quietly, as if to not break the sacredness of this place, that she understood, beautiful things always break the hardest. Feeling the tears once again she held up the barrier, wondering what would happen should she show such weakness in front of the Lord of the Western Lands. 'Why are you're eyes blue?' She startled a bit.

'Blue?' He nodded slightly, a mere half downturn of the head, such a regal being; is Sesshoumaru. Then his words caught up with her. Her eyes were blue? Even she did not understand, sometimes her eyes shone pink when using her miko powers, but otherwise her eyes were hazel. And then she realized, it was the tears, she had too many stashed behind the dam and if they couldn't be cried, then they would come out some other way. She felt them, swirling in her soul like a painful reminder, but she couldn't let them out, not here, not in front of an enemy.

Here I am, once again

I'm torn into pieces

Can't deny it, can't pretend

Just thought you were the one

Broken up, deep inside

But you won't get to see the tears I cry

Behind these hazel eyes

Suddenly he was in front of her, his clawed fingers gently tipping her chin so he could stare into her blue eyes. Blue eyes that swirled with so much sadness that he feared she would one day just break.

'Let them out.' She blinked slowly, fighting to hold up the dam that weakened with his words.

'I...can't.' He stared deep into her eyes, and then she saw it, the care he had for her, swirling within his own eyes. He had dropped his mask; he had dropped it for her...

It was too much, her dam broke and before she thought about what she was doing, she was wrapped around him, her sobs muffled by his fur pelt.

She felt his arm wrap around her, tucking her safely to him as her lake washed away in the form of tears, her soul slowly emptying of it's emotional burden, and when her tears finally stopped he looked down into shadowed hazel eyes once again.

She smiled at him thankfully, before once again burying her face into his fluffy pelt, him rubbing soothing circles on her back. He would be there for her when her soul was hurt once again, because it would be, until she realized that she could love another safely.

Looking into her eyes he could see her already rebuilding the barrier, knowing she was going to be hurt again until he could be there for her, the tears building up, hidden within her very soul.

Here I am, once again

I'm torn into pieces

Can't deny it, can't pretend

Just thought you were the one

Broken up, deep inside

But you won't get to see the tears I cry

Behind these hazel eyes

'Thank you Sesshoumaru.' She muttered, before steeling herself. Turning she detached herself from him and nearly gasped at the beauty surrounding her, the tears had truly blocked her vision, the sadness clouding her sight, for now the clearing was absolutely stunning.

Turning she noticed that the space behind her was empty, he was gone, but she knew he would always be there for her, and so making her way across the clearing she prepared herself, there was only one person who would ever see her tears, never again would Inuyasha see how much he hurt her, never again would he see the tears she cried.

AN: Just a little something I felt like doing, never written a song fic before. It's quite fun actually, trying to weave the story through the words of the song. Sorry if I didn't get it quite right, but I thought I'd give it a go :D.