There is no right answer to how to write characterisations, imo, because everyone sees and interprets the characters a bit differently. Further more, I've written Sesshoumaru differently depending on what kind of story it is and what the story needs. Sesshoumaru in an epic chapter fic drama is not wholly the same as Sesshoumaru in a crack one shot, after all.
It all depends on what your story needs. What aspects of Sesshoumaru's personality ypu want to focus on? And when it comes to writing someone in character, what is most important to me is that they are in character in YOUR story. That in the context of your fic, their behaviour makes sense and can be justified, even if it wouldn't 100% correlate with canon Sesshoumaru. Because we're not Takahashi-wannabes trying to recreate Inuyasha, we’re fic writers wanting to tell our own story.
Besides we never really see Sesshoumaru properly interact with a love interest in canon, so it's all up to our interpretation how he would act in romantic scenes. And I think it's justified that Sesshoumaru would behave differently towards a romantic partner than he would to everyone else.
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